(Closed) Long-distance friend officiating – good idea?

posted 7 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 3
Member
2755 posts
Sugar bee

I say go for it! Even if she doesn’t have experience, you have time to discuss what you want and rehearse – you can even have her come a day early and rehearse just the three of you a couple of times if you’re worried. I think it’s so lovely to have a ceremony performed by someone the couple knows and loves, because as you said, they can say some wonderful, personal things that a stranger couldn’t/wouldn’t. If she’s offering, that means she wants to so why not go for it?

Post # 4
Member
2183 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2011 - Florida Aquarium

My brother was our officiant. I was nervous about getting all the legal stuff done correctly, so Darling Husband and I were made legal our wedding week by a Clerk of the Court. Just an option- maybe your mom would feel better with that?

I highly recommend a friend officiant. My brother really personalized the ceremony that I wrote, and it was truly memorable.

Post # 6
Member
2183 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2011 - Florida Aquarium

It really depends on your state. I know that your friend would have to become ordained (can be online. I heard that only takes two hours or so). The concern we had is that I had called the Clerk’s office three times and recieved three different responses as to what my brother would have to do (we were all out of state, too) to make it legal. This concerned me. Also, I didn’t want him to be responsible for mailing in the license (and I didn’t want to either… too much mail gets lost!) Really, I was just paranoid and wanted to be sure our marriage was legal!

I would thank her for the offer, and tell her you love the idea, but you you would like to research more about what exactly would be the process. So maybe you both could look into it and make sure you both know what’s going on.

Also, do you have a notary in the family? She could always perform the ceremony and someone else could sign.

Hope this helps!

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