(Closed) Long distance relationships- the little things

posted 9 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
601 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2018

scootch over on the couch and make room for me.

Things I miss a lot are really simple; my SO always dims the lights in our apt at night time at just the right time- makes it super cozy.  Plus he’s always tidying up the kitchen.  

I miss watching good tv together and laughing (30 rock alone is not as fun)

I miss night time before we drift off to sleep snuggles.  and of course like you, surprise ice cream treats.

He comes home tomorrow for the weekend. I can’t wait- which reminds i need to tidy up this place- he’s the neat one, i’m the messy one.   🙂 

Post # 4
Member
2144 posts
Buzzing bee

My heart and hugs go out to all of you in a long distance relationship. My fiance and I did it for 4 years and I know how much it sucks! We’d never get more than a week or so together, (until the last year) and finally we couldn’t take it and I moved in with him. The little things are the best things, but, once you are together (in person!) forever, you won’t take them for granted!

Post # 5
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I miss his stupid little comments. I talk to my cats, and he’ll chime in dumb things when I don’t realize he’s listening, like "that’s what she said" or poke me when I’m watching TV real intensely. Or he’ll catch me checking myself out in the mirror and come up and scare me. Or get me a glass of water b/c i’m too flippin’ lazy to get it myself. Or get a slice of cheese out of the fridge and always grab me one, despite the *diet* i’m on. Mmm cheese

You’ll never take your time together for granted, that’s for sure. My Fiance bought me a surprise plane ticket to come see him this weekend. We were doing a 6-week stint, and I get to see him next next weekend anyways, but for a $250 ticket, he just figured he’d buy some time with me =]. I’m pretty excited even though I have to go to work at 6am tomrorow, booo!!!!

Post # 6
Member
1573 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

yeah we’ve been long-distance for the whole two years of being with each other so our engagement is short 5 months; it’s hard when he visits me and then he has to leave me I feel like there’s something wrong with the pictiure; I just miss having him around me as I get used to him then going back to single girl when he leaves, miss his little endearments, miss his hugs and signs of affection, kind of why we’re gettng married, the missing became unbearable; it’s especially hard when I had a bad day at work or he had, wish I could have a hug from him, he’ll comfort me on skype but not quite the same, hang in there ladies, soon we’ll be with the ones we love aw… 

Post # 7
Member
5823 posts
Bee Keeper

Being the deployed one I can TOTALLY feel your pain!  We are always apart it seems.  We started dating, I deployed for 8 months.  I come back for a month.  Then I’m deployed again for 10 months.  Then I’m back for two glorious months of leave!!  Then I’m deployed again for seven months…*sigh!*  I can’t wait to get to shore duty!!  I hate being gone literally all the time.  But I miss his snuggles.  I miss him kissing me every time he walks past me (seriously, every time!).  I miss hearing him say good night in my ear.  I miss midnight pajama runs to Taco Bell, or pajama runs to the 24 hour Walmart because we’re bored.  I miss walking the dog together, and going to the dog park and seeing him go all "Cesar Milan" on the other dogs.    I miss a lot, but we talk every day (I’m SO BLESSED!) and I’ll be coming home soon to finish planning the wedding (and to put him to work on the programs and a million other projects that I don’t have time to do!).

By The Way, you picking fights with him is a security mechanism.  They counsel deployed spouses all the time about it.  Basically you pick a fight (subconsciously) so that you’ll be mad at him, because it’s easier to be apart when you’re mad at him, and you won’t miss him as much.  Everyone does it, you’re not alone!  Just try to be aware of it, and apologize when you realize it wasn’t really about (xyz).  He’ll understand!

Post # 8
Member
2641 posts
Sugar bee

We went through it too.  It’s the pits. I would be so jealous of the couples that were actually in the same city….  But we had the best phone conversations.   Eve nthrough the long distancething is behind us, I’m with Lillindy. I can’t stand it if he’s not home for a night.  (I miss my bed buddy.)

Post # 9
Member
90 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

My faince and I spent over year seeing eachother for the weekend every 6 weeks or so.  We got so tired of 12 hour car rides and buying plan tickets and using all our cell phone minutes talking on the phone til 3 am,  that we decided enought was enough last May and we started looking for jobs near eachother. I found one before he did and ta da, I live in Wisconsin now. I am pretty glad we got fed up with the long distance thing. I do miss the excitement that I felt when I saw him running through the airport and scooping me up, or when I saw the sign that said Chicago Exit, but nothing compares to eating dinner together every night and sleeping next to eachother, and not having to leave on Sunday morning and crying on the plane the whole way back to Ohio. The hardest thing about long distance is the waiting and anticipation….it can make one a very patient person tho.

Hang in there Long Distancers, it will be better.

Post # 10
Member
153 posts
Blushing bee

I miss his presence, does that make sense?

It’s been three months since I last saw my FH…I miss sitting on the couch doing nothing.  I miss being able to snuggle up to him when I’m cold.  I miss holding hands.  I miss a lot of things.

I know it’ll be better for all of us long-distance relationship couples, but it’s still sad.  Talking on the phone is nothing compared to being with your FH.  =(

At least I get to see mine in 2 weeks.  Yay!

Post # 11
Member
1573 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

yeah I see my fiance in 3 weeks yay!nice to travel to europe, just hate the distance, we see each other every 2 to 3 months, he lives in liverpool I live in ny

 

he’s taking me to the london eye and see a broadway show on my birthday; it’s great we get to travel, but I’d rather have him within 1 mile of me; short-distance relationship people dont realize their blessings

Post # 12
Member
193 posts
Blushing bee

Sigh. I miss everything.

We met at a conference, so it was long-distance from the start. I know we’re lucky to be able to see each other for one to three weeks every other monthish – I know some people go ages between seeing each other – but sometimes I miss him so much it aches. I never realized before how much I need to be touched: just a hand on my cheek or a quick squeeze before he runs out the door… I need it. 

Luckily… it’s almost over. I’m going to visit him next week, then he’ll be here in June and that’s it! We were really fortunate to be flexible enough to eliminate the long-distance aspect of our relationship – it’s a hard, hard road. If he were anyone else, I would NOT have done it.

Post # 13
Member
116 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I’ve had to deal with a long distance relationship for at least the past FOUR YEARS!  Things I’ve missed are many and a long list.

Initially we used to write letters more often (in the first year).  But we could talk on the phone.  He isn’t good at writing long emails, so normally I’m just used to short ones.

But I really miss the things like going on our adventures for the weekend, like mountain biking, camping, making our meals together (creating random meals or trying to make something out of a cookbook).  I also miss hanging out with his friends and doing those activities.  I miss just curling up next to my fiance on the couch and watching a movie.

Post # 14
Member
538 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2011 - Franciscan Gardens

@MightySapphire  I’m currently deployed too! It’s sooo hard being away! This is my third time over here in Iraq and I feel like it never gets any easier. Do you ever get the feeling that everyone else’s life (including your FH’s) is on fast forward- meanwhile your enitre life is on "pause"? I find myself picking fights with my guy because he’s enjoying life and I’m stuck here! He got a cat the other day and I about flipped my lid! I know it was completley irrational, but I was so upset that he got a cat and didn’t even think to ask me how I would feel about a cat laying on my clothes and clawing up my furniture!  

Despite my complaints above- I am head over heels in love with my Mr. and I can’t WAIT to get home and start our married lives together~! I miss his cold feet touching me under the covers, and I miss that when I get something for myself in the kitchen and offer to get some for him, he refuses but as soon as I sit down he takes mine! lol

Post # 15
Member
538 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2011 - Franciscan Gardens

Oh one more thing! Do any of you long distancers have issues with the time differences between your location and your significant other?  My current time here is 12:11 PM and my Mr. is 2:11 AM- (-10hours!) so we’re operating at opposite times of day! It’s sooooo hard!

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