Post # 1

Member
1 posts
Wannabee
Hey guys,
My fiance and I are getting married later this year in Texas (December) and are pulling together our guest list. I live in WI while my fiance lives in TX. Since the wedding is in Texas, I was only planning on inviting family and a few close friends to the wedding. After we got back to WI and the snow had thawed a bit, I’d host a cookout at my place for the majority of my friends to swing by, meet her, and enjoy a good time. I feel a little guilty for not sending more invites to my WI friends, though, since they’d be likely to make the list if the wedding was here. So, I guess my question is twofold:
1) Should I send invites to my friends, regardless of location
2) Is it within proper etiquette to send out two separate invites, one for the wedding itself, one for an after-party/open house of sorts when we get back? Saying, we would’ve loved to have you there but we just decided to only invite a few of our closest friends and reserve the real WI party for the after-party.
Thanks for the advice,
Post # 2

Member
232 posts
Helper bee
I would send invites to them regardless of location, they may surprise you and make the trip to TX. I attended a wedding of a friend recently that was abroad and I would estimate at least 75 friends from the US made the trip out there to celebrate with them so you never know. We’ve also flown to Chicago for a friend’s wedding (we are in New England) and to St. Lucia for a destination wedding.
You can still invite them to the BBQ back home. Our friends that got married in St Lucia did a celebration when they got back, we attended both (brought a gift to one).
Post # 3

Member
946 posts
Busy bee
I would definitely send them invites! As long as you can afford to host them and the venue has the space for them if they all decide to come, I would definitely extend the invite. My mom invited two of her friends from when we lived in TX (wedding is in PA). I didn’t think they would come, since they are my mom’s friends and not mine, but they both already booked their rooms for the trip! People may surprise you.
You can also send out a separate invitation and say something like ‘for those unable to celebrate in TX with us, we’re hosting a BBQ in WI to share the love with everyone’ or something like that. But I’d still invite everyone to the wedding as well.
Post # 4

Member
194 posts
Blushing bee
- Wedding: October 2019 - City, State
I definitely would include your friends and family who live in Wisconsin. Let them decide if they’re able to make it or not instead of making that decision for them. They likely will want to be included in the actual wedding and who knows, more might be able to make the trip than you think. My good friend is getting married in Ireland next summer and she’s inviting people from California (where she lives) and a lot of friends and family are planning on attending (they also have a lot of time in advance to plan for travel). Her mentality is: people who want to be there will find a way to be there. If people can’t make it, that’s okay too.