(Closed) Long engagement

posted 8 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
191 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

We will have been engaged for 2.5 years by the time we get married. At first I did tons of planning because I was really excited, and then I realized that I kept changing my mind on ideas, so for now I’ve put planning on the back burner. I know the overall look and feel I’m going for, and what my budget is, but I’m leaving the small stuff until closer to the date because I’ve found that most vendors won’t really talk to you about anything until much closer. I wish I was getting married next year, but at least I have more time to slowly plan things without the stress.

Post # 4
Hostess
18643 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

We were engaged 3 years before we got married.

Post # 5
Member
929 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I am close to two years for engagement- and, on top of that, we have been dating for over five years!  We are actually getting married on our dating anniversary, so we will have been together for 7 years by the time we start our lives together :)…. 

Looking at the bright side, it gives me plenty of time to check out trends and to save $$$.  BUt man, I am itching to make it to the one year countdown mark!!!

Post # 6
Member
439 posts
Helper bee

Ours will be slightly over a two year engagement.  We can’t get married until 2012 because of school and other things, and we want to get married outdoors in Michigan at his parent’s farm.

I want to DIY a ton of stuff (I already have one project done and a second in the works), so I figure this gives me plenty of time.

Post # 7
Member
319 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

Ours will be 3 years…well actually we didn’t set a date till the engagement hit 3 years and by the time we get married it will be like 3.5 years.

For us it was more about saving money, we got engaged without a ring and my SO saved up for it. Also as an intercultural and interfaith marriage and our parents were both in different countries outside the US it took a long while to get everyone’s expectations on the same boat.

It was nice to tame my excitement. In the beginning I was obsessed and every wedding idea looked good to me. As time passed I knew more what I wanted, had plenty of time to sleep on it and get everyone’s opinions and had no rush in booking anything (so far!). I had tons of projects and details planned (like dancing classes, we were going to play music together, DIY favors etc) but in the end a lot just faded away as I realized it was exciting but not really “me”.

I see it as it’s a fun period that last very long and I like it:)

Post # 8
Member
5263 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2012

2.5 years – we’re a little over 6 months in. 

It hasn’t been bad. We have crazy schedules, so we plan a little here and there. We have a few major things like the venue, but as for details I’ve just been collecting inspiration. It’s a nice stress reliever to be able to think about it when I want to, but not feel rushed. 

Post # 9
Member
1315 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

We’ve been engaged since 10th January 2007. (!)Dating since January 2000.

It’s not really uncommon to have a long engagement here: nobody really expects you to set a date that quickly. It’s like the engagement is solely the expression of the commitment to marry, not the actual start of the preparations, if that makes sense.

We hadn’t a penny when we got engaged so at least now we will be able to have the wedding we want.

Post # 10
Member
144 posts
Blushing bee

We’ve been engaged since November 9, 2008 and are getting married July 2, 2011.  It was frustrating because when we first got engaged I was excited, but my friends were not so excited. They were initially, but when we told them about the wedding date they were freaking out about how long the wait was. We had to delay it for school so for us it was worth it. 

Post # 11
Member
3255 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

We also had to delay ours because I am a teacher and we made a big move in order for me to take the best job I was offered. Things are nuts with moving and adjusting to new jobs! When we get married, our engagement will have been 1.5 years.

People have told us we’re crazy to wait so long, but it was the best choice for us because it allows us to plan and have fun with it instead of cram everything in! My best advice would be to ignore people who criticize you for it and focus on one detail at a time. Having a long engagement allows you to focus on details instead of shoving everything together at the last minute. I’ve been playing with DIY centerpieces and decorations and researching vendors, although I won’t contact any until we get a little closer to the date. Just stay confident about your decision and HAVE FUN! 😀

Post # 12
Member
89 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 1999

We’ve been together since Nov. 2003. He proposed June 2010. We’ve set a tentative date of Oct. 2013. And my sister just had a wedding this July.

We figure this way we’ll have time to save up, DIY as much as we can, give relatives a break before coming across the country for another wedding and the wedding will be a week before our 10-year-anniversary.

Post # 13
Member
216 posts
Helper bee

My enagagement was just for a year, but I noticed how dramatically my wedding vision has changed from then to now. All the wedding related things I bought early in my planning (including even the dress!) has been changed and replaced with other things. So although the planning is exciting, I wouldn’t suggest making the same mistakes I did and buying things for the wedding until the date is much closer–because surely your vision of the wedding is going to transform during that time and it may become something you completely hadn’t expected.

Post # 14
Member
69 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

My engagement is about 22 months.  Yes, it may seem so far away but in time, you will realize how fast time had actually flown by.  We did not officially start planning until a year after our engagment.  We had other priorities, moving to the same city to be with each other, finding a job, and making sure that we would have enough money saved up for the wedding. 

For me, having a long engagment was the best thing we did.  We are now able to pay for the wedding on our own and still have savings left over to begin our lives together.  We also enjoyed just being engage and not worrying about planning which was nice until the date got closer.  

Yes, the wait can be a pain in the butt.  I’m three months away from my wedding and am feeling a little impatient.  However, I have DIY projects that are keeping me busy in the meantime. 

Have fun with planning and good luck!

 

Post # 15
Member
2196 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

Yep, we’re waiting until 2012. I can’t wait until I can actually go do all the fun stuff! Like trying on dresses and booking a venue.

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