(Closed) Long Engagement

posted 5 years ago in August 2013
Post # 3
Member
2589 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2014 - UK

I’ve got a two-year slog ahead of me… My advice is just to make the most of the time you’ve got, make as much as you can of your planning an event, so it feels like a big party the whole time. And use the time to get ahead of yourself, get stuff done in advance, and maybe take the time to experiment a bit – I’m hoping to make Maple and Pumpkin Butter for my favours. Never done anything like that before. But I’ve got time to try it out and if it doesn’t work, rethink things.

And then if you get as much as you can arranged and prepared for in advance, you can just cruise down to your wedding stress free! 🙂

Post # 4
Member
9567 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2018

Just try to focus on other things, I know it’s hard, plan and prepare in advance, but enjoy the time as well 🙂 I am 9 months in to a 3 and a half year engagement, so not really planning or stressing about the wedding too much yet.

Post # 5
Member
5480 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

We had a two year engagement 🙂

I didn’t do any planning at all and didn’t make any decisions (aside from venue & date) until about 12-14 months out.  I would suggest getting DIY projects done ahead of time, if you can.  I was scrambling about a month before the wedding- partly because I’m a lazy procrastinator, and partly because I just could NOT make up my mind about what I wanted.  I wish I had taken advantage of the extra time to really get a lot done.

I also stayed involved in non wedding activities… I ran two half marathons and a full marathon.  I got in great shape.  I spent time with my dogs.  We went to Vegas- twice.  We bought a house, we started TTC (I was actaully 7 weeks pregnant at the wedding!).  We enjoyed the hell out of life during our engagement!

Post # 6
Member
1769 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Girl, I feel you. Our engagement is exactly 24 months…we’re 20 months away right now. Every day I’m like “I want to just go to city hall and get married!” because really that’s all I want – to be married…but I know I’d regret not having a wedding. I first thought a long engagement would be relaxing, but for some reason it’s almost stressing me out more.

I’m trying to deal with it by only focusing on one thing at a time – right now it’s photographers. So we’ve been meeting with photographers, about one every other week, and plan to decide by next month.

After that, we’re going to book our ceremony space, then it’s the holidays – who has time for wedding planning during that?!

Then, it’s my birthday, so we’re going to plan a weekend getaway, then we’re at the 12 month mark, so it’s crunch time.

Just mentally break your engagement down to chunks, and focus on one thing at a time…it’s been helping me!

Post # 8
Member
246 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I have been feeling your pain. We got engaged almost 3 years ago and MONEY was the reason. We are now planning a May or June 2013 wedding and decided we will do it one way or another regardless as we have been together 7 years now. (I hate paying for my own wedding LOL But hey…someone has to do it!)

Post # 9
Member
246 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

^I didnt start buying stuff until the last 7-8 months! My advice is to start slowly buying stuff ASAP as it not hit your wallet as hard over time…in the end you will get more and spend more than you thought possible in your budget that way (so you get more for your money)!

Post # 10
Member
9567 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2018

@ChelleNBlake:  I second this, FI and I have already bought my garter, started buying books for our centerpieces, etc 🙂

Post # 11
Member
10454 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2014

Ours will be 26 months. 10 down, 16 to go! It is a very long time yes but I’ve so far thought it flew by. I tackle one wedding thing at to time (or try to, but sometimes I go crazy and do more). That makes it better. 

Post # 12
Member
1677 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@Mrs_G_2B:  We were engaged three years. I drove everyone nuts planning for that long. Book your venue and major vendors first (photography, anything else that’s important to you – for us it was food). 

If you’re doing DIY invites, doing those early really helped – they took me three months to do, then sat in a storage box under my mom’s bed for a year.

Post # 13
Member
4607 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I’m getting married almost exactly one month shy of three years. I thought that a long engagement was going to allow me to be relaxed but I quickly figured out that wasn’t the case. We waited so long because we needed things to fall into place, but even with three years everything is still going to be last minute unless we go to the courthouse. 

I agree with the other posters who have said get your DIY things out of the way if you’re doing them. I wasn’t planning on doing anything DIY but I’ve learned that I can be crafty over the last two years. 

Also, do unwedding things to keep your mind off of it. When I got super stressed and angry about my engagement, I cleaned house. 

Post # 14
Member
1425 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Rosehill Community Center

@Mrs_G_2B:  I’m at roughly the same time schedule as you, engaged for about 8 months, 10 or so to go!  It’s weird how quickly the first 6 months or so went for me, and how little I got accomplished during that time.  Now I’m like, overwhelmed with all the big decisions I need to make, and kicking myself for not doing them sooner.  I just want all the vendors and stuff to be picked so I can move on to the fun details!

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