(Closed) Long Engagement Blues

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: Long engagement? Tell me more!

    I have/had a long engagement, and I loved it!

    I have/had a long engagement, and it drove me nuts!

    I have had/am having a short engagement, thank goodness!

    I have had/am having a short engagement, and I wish I had more time!

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    I wear the cheese, the cheese does not wear me.

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  • Post # 17
    Member
    85 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: May 2015

    I have been engaged for 3 years and don’t even have a date yet!  We were both married before and he’s Catholic so we are waiting to see if his first marriage will be annuled by the church.  The church won’t let us set a date until we get the final decision because the process takes so long.  So I can’t even book my vendors! 🙁

    Honestly, at first it didn’t bother me very much but now it’s driving me crazy!  Especially now that my best friend just got engaged and is getting married this September!  Just doesn’t seem fair!  But on the bright side I’ve been able to buy things here and there and kind of spread out the cost.  It suprises me how much money I’ve spent because it doesn’t seem like I’ve spent that much because it’s spread out.

    Post # 18
    Member
    633 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    I chose that I love it AND that it drives me nuts! We got engaged in December 2010, right after our daughter was born. We weren’t in a hurry to set a date, so it took us a few months to settle on November 2012…due to my FI’s job (at that time) taking him out of town a lot during the year. Well, due to other circumstances beyond our control we pushed it back to April 2013…and NOW we just had to cancel THAT because, once agian, my Fiance got screwed over by an employer and we just can’t afford it.

    I changed my date on here to April 1, 2014…April Fool’s Day, b/c I’m not getting my hopes up by setting a real date! On one hand, I can ‘start over’ with the planning, which is SO MUCH FUN to me, but on the other, I’m going crazy, b/c I can’t solidify anything unitl Fiance find a new/better job! AAAAGH!

    Post # 19
    Member
    2902 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    I never wanted a long engagement but it’s what I’m getting. We are in the process of moving country so I have to wait until we get home and settle into our new jobs before getting married. Logistically & financially it’s the only thing that makes sense but I am a planner as well as being indecisive so having all this time means I’m unable to make a firm decision and stick with them. On top of that I can’t visit the locations so it’s hard to envision anything. I know one thing for sure, I am not going dress shopping until it’s absolutely time. Having any extra time will give me major dress regreat.

    Post # 20
    Member
    118 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: May 2015 - Motor Yacht Destiny

    @MarshmallowLatte:  Hey there! We’re date twins! And actually, after reading your post, we have quite a bit in common besides that.  I too, am having a long engagement, having gotten engaged May 29th, 2012, and getting married 3 years and 1 day after the fact.  You’re a bit older than me, but I am also graduating college in December 2014, so I understand the desire to have a degree and more career/financial stability – ditto, on the saving up money to pay for it mostly ourselves thing, I totally understand.  Look on the bright side though, planning is fun but also lengthy, so giving ourselves a little more time to plan is almost never a bad idea!  I know that my “3 year” engagement, turned into “23 months left” VERY quickly, so don’t be fooled by the amount of time you think you’ve got – it goes by fast!

    Post # 21
    Member
    578 posts
    Busy bee

    Definitely sympathize with you. But the good news is, it really goes by faster than you think! AND I always tell myself, that this is going to be the shortest title I will get in our relationship (GF for less than 3 years, Fiance for less than 2, but WIFE for forever) 🙂 Enjoy this fleeting title of fiancee! There are so many girls out there wishing they could have it! 

    Post # 22
    Member
    5063 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: April 2014

    View original reply
    @wildflowerbee:  That’s a lovely way to put it. “A wife forever.” I can wait a bit longer to get that title. 

    Post # 23
    Member
    6354 posts
    Bee Keeper

    I love my long engagement, it’s what we wanted, it wasn’t forced on us due to external circumstances. It’s letting us plan for exactly what we want, and avoid what we don’t want. We are only planning to do this once, after all!

    The only sad part is having to delay being “YAYMARRIED!!!1” and TTCing, but, it’s worth the wait 🙂

    The topic ‘Long Engagement Blues’ is closed to new replies.

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