Post # 17
I see I’m in agreement with most here- over 2 years is long. I’ve read in several places that the average engagement now is 15 months long. This makes sense to me with the greatest number of engagements occurring between Dec-Feb and most people wanting to get married June-Sept.
We will have a 17 month engagement. I wanted to get married in late spring or early fall, and this fall is too close in terms of saving up enough money and getting the venue we want. So late spring next year it is!
Post # 18
@Creiddylad: I voted for all options over 1 year. I think 6 months – 1 year is standard and after that you get into what people would term a “long” engagement.
Post # 19
I agree with you that an engagement is something that should happen as soon as you know you want to marry each other. But I think my SO is similar to yours in that he’ll need some convincing of that idea.
Yes, it makes sense. The thing is, for me, I know I want to marry my SO (and am pretty sure he feels the same about me, but will be talking to him about that to find out for sure soon), and I feel like getting engaged is the natural next step. However, I’m a graduate student and, although my parents have said that they will pay for my wedding, I feel that as a modern woman I should be able to contribute, at least! So I think a wait for a year and a half or so would be best so I can save a little towards all of it.
I agree about the buying-a-ring-to-shut-her-up thing not being OK. I have to say I don’t agree on the engagement being a time only for wedding planning– I can imagine my SO and I agreeing on when we wanted to get married at first, but taking the planning a bit more slowly since I’ll be in grad school for another year from now. I think I’d like a year after getting done (or mostly done– we’ll se how my research goes) to plan and save money. I feel like engagement is a time to prepare for your lives together, in more ways than wedding planning.
Post # 20
Anything over 2 years seems long to me. I only had a 7 month engagement and would have loved a year or more to plan just because of the amount of work involved. It’s like taking on a part-time job in addition to your regular full-time job.
However, 2 years or more usually means there’s a reason other than “time to plan”, maybe family or money issues that are impacting how soon the couple can get married. Hence, I think of that as a long engagement.
Post # 21
or engagement is going to be 2 years. this is to give us enough time to plan and save for a wedding that we want. i will also be done with grad school this december so i have time to find a full-time job and enough time to find a place for us to live! 🙂
Post # 22
@Creiddylad: I’d say anything over 2.5 – 3 years 🙂 We’ll be having a long engagement, (3+ years) Why? Because we’re poor 😛 Haha! (No but seriously, donations accepted)
I think it will just give us a chance to save some $$$$$
My sister and her fiance were engaged for 10 years!! Now THAT’S a long engagement!!
Post # 23
I think a “long” engagement is probably anything over 2-ish years. Long does not mean bad, though. Ours will be about 22 months in the end.
We are graduating in a couple of months so by the time the wedding rolls around, I’ll either be finished grad school or we will both have been working for nearly 2 years. Enough time for us to settle in to a new place, save and plan a wedding at the time of year we want.
We thought about waiting until closer to graduation to get engaged but we found the PERFECT ring and got too excited to wait haha.
Post # 24
I’d consider 1 1/2-2+ years to be long. Definitely anything over 2 years!
Since I think it usually takes around a year to plan a wedding (I generally consider that to be plenty of time), I’d consider things longer than that to be a long engagement.
I’ve only been engaged 4 months and I have 8 months left…and half the time I feel like it’s too long! I’m tired of it already! So I don’t think I could deal with a 2 year or longer one personally.
Also…the longer you have to plan is also the longer you have to be stressed out about it! I’m ready for it to be over
Post # 25
I have been engaged for several years. Multiple family members with long term illness, other people’s weddings, babies, miscarriages, deaths, other family drama, as well as not being a type A personality have pushed the date far into the future.
Post # 26
I think over a year and a half is long. Mine is 22 months, and I specifically wanted a long engagement.
Post # 27
anything over two years is long to me.
Post # 28
I think anything over three years is kinda long, but to be honest, I think different times suit different people. Maybe a college couple got engaged, and want to wait till they graduate to get married, which might be three years. I think that’s a perfectly fine time frame. It really all depends on the couple.
A lot of people I know have 1-2 year engagements. I have a 1 1/2 year engagement, and I’m perfectly happy with my timeline. I’m the kinda person who needs to plan and organize everything well in advance to make sure I get the photographers, videographers, and venues that I want. I feel anything less than one year is not enough time for me, otherwise I will completely freak out and stress lol
Post # 29
Yeah, I’d freak out at a year engagement too– partially because I am planning to make my dress, and it is going to be pretty fancy and complicated. Right now it looks like my SO and I will be getting married in 2 or 3 years. But I still want to be engaged really soon! I could use a 2 year engagement just to make sure that dress gets done right. . .
Post # 30
Here’s how I see it:
Less than 9 months: short engagement
9 to 12 months: shorter engagement
12 to 18 months: average engagement
18 months to 2 years: longer engagement
Over 2 years: long engagement
I don’t consider anything less than two years a long engagement. It may be a longer engagement, but I don’t think it’s long enough to be considered a long engagement. Maybe it’s because I’m having a three-year engagement, but it’s just my opinion.
Post # 31
My Fiance proposed to me on the first day of the yr in 2012 and we’re getting married Dec 21st 2013, about 2wks shy of it being a two year engagement. I do consider it to be kind of a long engagement but it was totally necessary due to school, work and everything else in between.