- 9 years ago
- Wedding: September 2013
I was directed to this site via another message board so I am new here! I’m looking for somewhere to get support/advice on what’s been happening (or not happening) so far with my engagement and sort of odd circumstances. This is the biggest problem so far …
I got engaged about 6 months ago. My fiance and I said right off the bat that it’d be about 2-3 years until we got married because we have a lot going on in our lives. (to make a long, long, LONG story short, we needed to get better jobs, a place of our own, save up some money, & clear up some debts). We also had a lot of family stuff going on with sickness, etc.
But the people closest to me have been downright MEAN about us “waiting.” One of my aunts (who has never been engaged or married at age 50), said “Well it’s about time.”
One of my best friends (who I’d already asked to be a bridesmaid) said that if we were waiting that long then “you’ll never get married” in the most condescending voice I’ve ever heard her use.
Another good friend said “if people waited to get married until they could afford it, no one would ever be married.”
People ask why my fiance is “dragging his feet” or why we’re “making excuses,” etc, etc.
This is tearing me up. Instead of feeling excited and supported and loved, I feel embarassed and hurt. This is supposed to be a happy time for us! And family and good friends are supposed to support you whether you get married in 10 days or 10 years!
Why are they being so mean and hurtful and how do I react to this?
It’s so bad that sometimes I want to stop wearing my engagement ring just so people don’t ask me: “oh, when are you getting married?!”
Because when I reply with: “In about 2 or 3 years,” people literally shrink away from me like I have leprosy.
Why is this happening?!?!?!