(Closed) Long Engagements and Family Reaction

posted 6 years ago in March 2014
Post # 3
Member
67 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I got engaged last August, and we are getting married in June of next year. I actually kind of prefer a longer engagement. It lets you take more time to plan and come up with ideas. Also, you can buy things when you see them on sale instead of trying to make a bunch of big purchases all at once. Actually, my fiance was the most upset about the long engagement.

I just used the excuse that the venue I wanted had a 2 year waiting list 🙂 It’s a military clubhouse right on the water. It’s cheaper than most places and NO TAX!! Neither of us is military, but I have a friend who was willing to sponsor us so we can have our reception there.

Honestly, I don’t think you will ever please anyone. Everyone has their own opinions on when or how the wedding should take place. Just remember it’s your wedding and you have to make yourself happy!

Post # 4
Member
4360 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

Embarrassingly I’ve been on the other side.  Friends of mine will have been engaged 2 years by the time of their wedding. When they told us their date we assume this year not next!  I understand their reasoning, but it’s not for us.  Do what’s right for you guys!  For some people a long engagement just makes sense 🙂

Post # 5
Member
25 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2015

We are getting married June 2015 because Fiance is finishing his grad program then. Our family hasn’t made so many comments as friends have but a lot of ppl do say “wow three years for server!” I have even been told tht one of my moms friends Sked her if we would even still want to get married when the wedding day comes!!! 

But I’m just ignoring because it is really the only time that works for us. Would I like to get married sooner? Of course. But it is just not finacially realistic until he finishes school. Plus it gives us more time to save up and decide what we want! 

You can say exactly what you said here … Tht your Fiance is away for work and this is the only date tht makes sense for you twomat this point, both financially and emotionally. 

 

Post # 6
Member
66 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Completely! We got engaged April 2011 and we were in no hurry to be married… we’re already living together and everything is perfect, I hate rushing and want to plan our wedding leisurely!

We’ve had lots of good respones and tonnes of bad ones… especially from my parents.. they don’t approve of them living together before marriage and would rather us get it over and done yet so it’s “legal in the eyes of God”. I also know that once we are married, our parents will hassle us to have grand kids and we’re SO not ready for that yet!!!!

But, I know my dad’s health isn’t at it’s best anymore… and FI’s dad is in hospital as we speak… so we decided 2 years would be fine.

Post # 7
Member
1133 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

I am not engaged yet, but 2 years to me is absolutely perfect. That is how we are going to plan it, and honestly, about 6 friends got married this summer, all of them had at LEAST 2 year engagements.  So I actually thought it was the normal.

Besides, you have time now to slowly purchase items, or chose your perfect venue, etc. So much less stress.  Don’t worry about what other people think, in the end, people will remember that you were married for 50 years, not engaged for 2.

Post # 9
Member
132 posts
Blushing bee

We are considering March 2014 as well. It will take us a few more months to save up enough $ for our dream venue/guest list, and we don’t want to get married in the winter, so March 2014 is looking like reality. 

I have mixed emotions, we are older, and had hoped for a short engagement, so part of me is sad, but a longer engagement leaves us time to shop for deals, do more DIY, etc… 

Post # 10
Member
41 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: March 2014

We got engaged this past June, and the wedding is set for March 2014.  Most people say that that’s a long time to wait to get married.  I think it’s perfect.  To those who ask, I have decided to wait so I can do things the way I want to do them.  I am not getting any support from my parents, so we’re doing things ourselves.  I like that the wedding is set so far in advance because I can slowly plan.

I have to agree with others who have posted their reasons for wanting a long engagement.  I’m older (even though it’s my first wedding), I can do things the way I want, less stress, etc.  We didn’t want 2013, as it would be too soon.  I didn’t want 2015, because I don’t want to wait that long to marry him.  2014 seemed perfect in my eyes!

Post # 11
Member
2116 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Our engagement is 14 months long, and my family even reacted to THAT.

 

I wanted an October wedding.

 

It wasn’t going to be thrown together in 3 months.

 

Thus, 14 months…….and I’m so glad that I have had that long because it’s made planning things a lot easier.

Post # 12
Member
641 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

I’m getting married in March 2015! People always have something to say about it, too!

Post # 13
Member
41 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: March 2014

@SoobySays:  Mr. M teased that he would put the wedding to March 14, 2015 just so he could have a “real” Pi wedding…  3.1415 (get it…ha!)  I told him absolutely not!  That would be way too long for me!! LOL

Post # 14
Member
366 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I got engaged February 2012 and our date is set for March 2014. I like having heaps of time to plan. It also means we have a lot more time to save and can affoord the things we want! It  also means you have a bigger choice of vendors Smile

Post # 15
Member
2196 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

My FH & I will be engaged longer than we first dated!  Met October 6 2011, engaged September 26 2012, married March 21 2014 😀  I must say the long engagement is kinda killing my “I want to make decisions NOW perfectionist side” but we chose the length based simply on when we wanted to get married: March (late summer here in Australia).  We didn’t feel we could plan a wedding in a few short months so we had to push it out to 2014.  Admittedly it also works well for giving our families slightly more time to adjust to the fact that yes we’re in a relationship, yes we’re engaged and yes we’re getting married! (they’re exceptionally supportive & lovely, it’s just that neither of us had been in a relationship before, EVER, so it’s kind of been sprung on everyone, including us! lol)

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