Long term contraception

posted 2 years ago in Married Life
Post # 16
7806 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

When we were done exH had a vasectomy. He absolutely did not want more children; it was the only doctor appointment I didn’t have to schedule for him or nag him about. Contrary to causing any “manhood” issues it was actually quite liberating to be able to have worry free sex whenever we wanted. 

Post # 17
179 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Female sterilization is no longer a huge surgical procedure. I have a consult at the end of the month to speak with my doctor about a bilateral salpingectomy. They remove portions of each Fallopian tube. It’s 100% effective, and actually decreases your risk for ovarian cancers, since many of them start  in the tubes. It’s laparoscopic, and usually an in/out procedure where you’re home the same day with some minor incisions and lifting restrictions for a week or so. Yes your husband could get a vasectomy, mine has one as well. But I also want to take ownership over my own bodily autonomy. What if we divorce? What if I am raped? I’d rather know for certain myself that unwanted pregnancy is never something I’ll have to worry about again. Especially with the current political climate and administration, I no longer trust that access to birth control or abortion is something we’ll have forever. 

Post # 18
204 posts
Helper bee

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Twizbe :  my husband wants a vasectomy (it’s eerie how excited about it he is.  He just keeps giggling and goign “snip snip!!!” MMmmk buddy.)

We agreed we’d use some less permanent contraception until we were totally sure we’re one and done.  Honestly probably just condoms.. though I’ve been considering a hormonal IUD like skyla or mirena.  I HATED HATED HATED the copper IUD so that’s out, but most women seem to have much better reactions to skyla and mirena.  I don’t thint it should affect my breast milk since the hormones act quite locally…


Post # 19
9800 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

I have a mirena.  It does have hormones but they are localized to the utereus.  I was previously on regular hormonal BCP and it is a big difference (mirena being much better!).  I had super heavy periods when I was young and was put on BCP for that at 13 so I would never consider the copper IUD lol.  I love my mirena because I have no periods. I had some cramping on and off for a few weeks and spotted lightly the first month but otherwise I just get some (light) spotting for a few days every once and awhile.  I did not get mine until my period came back after #2 and he was just over 1 at that point but I continued and still breastfed him (still do a couple times a day) without issue.  Mirena and the minipill are both compatible with breastfeeding (same hormone) but the mirena is much more effective and it’s not systemic.

As far as I know your only non-hormonal options aside from sterilization/vasectomy are barrier methods, such as the condom, sponge, cervical cap, or diaphragm, spermicide, the copper IUD, and natural family planning.  

If you were on the hormonal birth control pill but haven’t tried the mirena I would recommend consider giving it a try if you’re not ready for sterilization.  I have a much easier time on the mirena as compared to standard BCP.

Post # 20
1431 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2019 - USA

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Twizbe :  You could go with the copper iud which lasts 10 years and non hormonal but insertion is unpleasant and may cause pain or discomfort during sex. I am actually having to have mine replaced after 4 years because it shifted, but honestly it’s been pretty good for me so far bc I don’t have to think about it. It’s an option. 

Post # 21
594 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2018 - City, State

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anondotcom :  omg your comment from hubby made me kaugh so hard!!!

Im 1 year into copper iud. It was rough getting it in- Ive never had kids. My periods were heavier and longer for the first few months (but nothing compared to what the implanon did to me!!!!) 1 year in they have lightened considerably but still longer than prior to. I track mine on am the app called Clue and cam see it improving every time.

After a similar thread was posted I asked fiance you if he would get a vasectomy. He had never thought of it (what a world never considering contraception!!! 😜) but said he guess he would. We dont want kids. 27and 36yo. So Im definitely  putting that on the table when I get to the IUD removal in approx 9 years time. 

Post # 22
324 posts
Helper bee

I just want DH to get a vasectomy already. We’re CFBC (and should this change, we want to foster or adpot an older child – I’m in no way interested in pregnancy or babies), I don’t get on with hormonal contraception so we use condoms and I’m really sick of them. He’s being a bit irrational about the idea of a vasectomy at the moment but I’m sure we’ll get there. 🙄

Post # 23
2858 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

Try to get your husband to have the vasectomy!! I have no idea what the waiting list is for it with NHS, but get him signed up for it ASAP! It’s so much easier than the tubal ligation. Maybe he can talk to his doctor about it so that he knows it won’t effect us manhood! 

I have the Nexplanon. It does have hormones, but I haven’t had side effects other than I almost never have my period. I had a lot of bleeding at first, but my doctor had me schedule taking Ibuprofen and that stopped the bleeding. 

My husband agrees to the vesectomy, but his insurance isn’t as good as mine. So, it would cost us more money. So for now, I just do the Nexplanon. 

Post # 24
453 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

If you don’t want hormones, your options are the copper IUD and sterilization. If you don’t mind localized hormones, your option is Mirena. 

For sterilization, your husband won’t be any less manly if he gets a vasectomy. It is a pretty easy outpatient procedure. If he is worried about his manhood, have him talk to a doctor. Frankly, I don’t have the patience for that kind of thinking though.

Or you can get sterilized. Which is much more invasive and has a much longer recovery period and affects your body way more (it starts menopause and changes your hormone balance for example). You’ve already had two kids. He can take one for the team, in my opinion!

Post # 25
2543 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

I’ll be another vote for the copper IUD. I hated hormonal BC for myelf and you couldn’t pay me to take it.

Insertion HURT – I’ve never had kids – but not as much as childbirth I imagine.

I’ve always had heavy periods and the IUD did make them heavier the first few months. Eventually they went back to normal and after a year or two were actually lighter than prior to insertion.

We are TTC now – I had it removed last month during my pap smear and it was a piece of cake.

I think once we are done having kids DH will probably get a vasectomy.

Post # 26
755 posts
Busy bee

Twizbe :  I’ve not read through the comments so a pp might already have told you but the nhs waiting list isn’t that long at all. My husband is having his next week and he only saw his gp a couple of months ago

Post # 27
2857 posts
Sugar bee

I had my tubes tied while I was having a c section with #2. I knew I didn’t want any more children. Oh, and my partner was not persuaded by my arguments that he should get a vasectomy instead.

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