(Closed) Long vent about my really rude roomie, what should I do??

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: What should I do?
    Stay there & just deal with it for another month. Who needs sleep? : (13 votes)
    15 %
    Rent a storage unit & move everything I own there & cut off the bills & stay somewhere else : (57 votes)
    65 %
    Pack up my entire room & move all stuff into my room & keep on bills & stay somewhere else : (13 votes)
    15 %
    Other (please advise) : (5 votes)
    6 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    208 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    It sounds like you have entered roomate-war.  That is no fun and you should not have to live in that type of environment.  Before you do anything, however, I think you should have a sit down with all of your roomates to try to hash things out.  Texts are generally not condusive to roomate communication on this level of disfunction.  Explain how you feel, listen to how they feel, try to work something out.  They are old enough to be living in an apartement and paying rent, they should be old enough to have an adult discussion about quality of life.  If they are unable to communicate with you and continue the behavior, you should probably rent a storage unit and move out.  It does not sound like a healthy living environment.  I’m really sorry you are having to go through this 🙁 

    Post # 4
    Member
    14186 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2009

    Oh wow. That is really rough. I don’t really know how best to handle it. I want to smack the bias. I lived with some roommates in SEattle a few summers ago and we literally had to have a “roommate meeting” one night after dinner. It worked and it didn’t turn into a screamfest b/c there were 4 of us, not just 1 on 1 if that makes sense.

    Also…be careful of retaliation. If the home is in your name, they could do damage to it and you could get screwed. Renting a room means that–renting a ROOM and they should be considerate of the person who’s actually liable for the entire place (you). If you take up a wall to box up your stuff, considering you’re moving out soon, that makes sense. But if it IS in their way, then it should definitely go. It doesn’t sound like it is from what you’ve said though.

    I WOULD definitely tell them “look i’m moving out and i’m going to cut off the electric/power/etc unless you want them transferred in your name”. I think, by law, you are only really required to have water or something. You could theoretically live without electricity…if you were crazy =]

    Post # 6
    Member
    2090 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    Oh man, crazy roommates SUCK. I’d echo what that other posters have said about having a sit-down meeting. If they refuse, I would send them an email (and keep a copy), explaining what day you are moving out, and that upon X date, the utilities will be shut off and whomever is still living in the house is responsible for them after that.

    Also take date-stamped pictures of EVERY inch of the space, before, and after you move out, especially if you move out before them.

    Post # 8
    Member
    14186 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2009

    If they won’t work with you, i don’t think there’s much you can do. They’re obviously incredibly inconsiderate. Unless you start wearing earplugs or something…man, i don’t know. Ambush them in their room sometime?

    All i know is i am one crabby ass when i don’t get sleep and in the middle of the night i’d probably start screaming for them to shut up. Oh wait, i lived in a sorority and always got woken up by drunk girls and that is ALWAYS what i did! But house rules are “quiet hours” after 10 so i was justified, haha.

    But hell maybe it’s time to turn the radio on in the morning…..that woudl be totally counterproductive, i know =(

    Post # 10
    Member
    214 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: March 2010

    Honestly, if you don’t care to continue their friendship when you are married, and moved out. I would just move out and turn off all the bills. It seems they have no consideration for you, and you shouldn’t for them. I would just tell roomate J what the hell is going on and give her the option to put the bills in her name, since she is not a part of the roomate war. I would just get yourself out of that toxic situation, because I think it will only get worse.

    Post # 12
    Member
    831 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    When people like this really make PO-ed, heck I’d fork over a little money to store all my stuff in the storage unit, cut all utilities, and high tail out of there! Maybe you can stay at your FI’s place?

    Post # 13
    Member
    114 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    I’ve had my fair share of nightmare roommates over the year- seriously I should write a book. My advice would be to not even bother to sit down and try and talk to them. It’s a complete waste of your time. They are pissed at you because you are leaving and they have to find a new place to live, so they are going to make your life hell until you leave. They are doing all of this stuff on purpose- being loud, making a big deal about the boxes- to get back at you. If it were me, I would get anything that I had of value out of there so that your stuff is protected, and buy some earplugs (they really do work- trust me) to get through the next few weeks the best that you can. Is staying with your Fiance not an option? 

    The tough part of all of this is that you have all of the bills in your name- meaning that it will be easy for them to screw you over and not pay you at the end of the month. So, I would really try and be as civil as you can be just to make sure you get your money. After you move out, then you can cut all ties with them- as I’m sure you will want to.

    Post # 15
    Member
    2867 posts
    Sugar bee

    Yeah, sitting down and talking with them won’t help at this point–believe me, I tried that so many times with a horrible roommate (I was having nightmares about her pulling terrible things on me–it was that bad).

    Definitely check w/ the leasing people if you’re allowed to cut of your electricity and gas, b/c atleast with my complex they won’t allow it if you’re the primary lease holder.

    I suggest staying elsewhere…it’s not healthy to live in that kind of environment.  As for your stuff, put it in your room and buy a new doorknob with a lock if you don’t already have one and then just switch it back when you are “officially” out of there (which is what I had to do b/c my roommate was threatening property damage and had already bragged about urinating on a previous roommate’s toothbrush).  The doorknobs are fairly cheap, buy them at Walmart or Ace Hardware for less than $15 and are easy to install with a simple flathead screw driver.  Have your dog stay with your Fiance or mom if possible.

    Post # 16
    Member
    2239 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    Is it possible they’re acting like jerks because they feel left out because you are moving on (in a sense) with your life? Not to give them an excuse, or a pass or anything, but could it be they are really just jealous and being mean because of it? If you still want to be friends with them I’d just ignore their evil ways for now and focus on getting out of there.

     

    The topic ‘Long vent about my really rude roomie, what should I do??’ is closed to new replies.

    Find Amazing Vendors