(Closed) Looking for a way to word our Honeyfund?

posted 7 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 182
Member
13517 posts
Honey Beekeeper

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@Kir32:  People commonly think a lot of things that are not true. 

Post # 183
Member
1092 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

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@weddingmaven:  Ok….? I was simply stating that on this forum it seems like any mention of a registry or lack of registry is tacky. And, on this forum lack of mentioning a registry is an indication to your guests that you want cash. I’m not saying it is accurate and I’m not saying that every guest will assume that – I’m just saying that is the general understanding on this forum. I don’t think that is even debatable. However, if you think I am wrong then feel free to search for topics where someone is asking how to just ask for cash for wedding gifts.

Post # 184
Member
1678 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@alexysmyzpha:  i love honeyfunds and i love the way you’ve worded it! i think that in this day and age, anything goes. its your wedding – wear what you want, decorate however you want, and use an alternative registry. if some of your guests don’t like it or “approve” they can choose another avenue 🙂

 

Post # 185
Member
13517 posts
Honey Beekeeper

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@Kir32:    If you agree that it’s not an accurate perspective, then  we don’t disagree on this point.  I realize that a lot of people think this way, but so what?  That doesn’t make it any less inappropriate for being a common misconception or interpretation on the part of a guest and doesn’t make it any less proper for the couple who  forgo registering for the right reasons. 

There are two sides to this that do not necessarily have a relationship. 

Post # 186
Member
4430 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Does anyone see that there’s 5 pages and not one is a response from OP? It’s a shame people had to go off topic about letter Q’s and G’s and whether it’s right to have a honeyfund.  It seems like only a handful even answered her question. 

Hope you found the right wording OP. 

Post # 187
Member
1092 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

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@weddingmaven:  But the more people that think this way the more it becomes a fact, not a misconception. And on this forum, I would say that it leans much more towards being fact than misconception.

I don’t think you and I are really butting heads. I just think there is no way to win on this forum when it comes to registeries. That was the point I was making by stating that every option is considered tacky here.

Post # 188
Member
7643 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

Trying to stay the course of the thread, I didn’t have a registry. We just put nothing. Most people got the hint that we didn’t need physical items, but we still got them, and I still, like a thankful person, sent a heartfelt thank you for the gift and left it alone.

That beings said, I am 25 (24 when I married), and I had never heard of a honeyfund. Is this more of an area thing? I would guess that more so than an age thing. At any rate, just do what you want to do. People are going to love it and people are going to hate it.

Your wording was fine, by the way. I would try to add a bit about your situation in there if you can.

Post # 189
Member
366 posts
Helper bee

I really love how I’m being judged for taking a 28 day honeymoon. I didn’t realize using my regular annual vacation time and having disposable income would be judged so negatively!

For the record, we CAN and we ARE paying for the entire honeymoon ourselves. The travel related gift options we’ve put on our Honeyfund are for extra things like excusions, special dinners, and experiences. We’re doing the honeymoon whether things get gifted from Honeyfund or not.

Not that it’s anyone’s business, but we’ve negotiated a very good rate for the cruise –  $1,999pp. (For some perspective, I’m attending a destination wedding this year that’s $1,750pp for one week.) We’re paying for our flights using the travel miles we’ve built up from using our credit card to pay wedding expenses (which we then pay off in full each month). We’ll still be debt free when all is said and done, even though we’re also paying for our own wedding. As for getting 4 weeks of vacation time, it’s my entire vacation allowance for the year and I’m choosing to use it for our honeymoon.

You might read that and say “well then, you certainly don’t need people to gift you anything!” True. But our friends and family have expressed a desire to give us a gift to celebrate our marriage and some have said they’d like a registered list to that end. We’ve complied and provided some suggestions on a wedding registry. They can chose from those options or from outside those options.

ALL our guests will be graciously hosted at our wedding and will recieve a thank you note for attending and sharing in our day – whether they give us a gift or no gift at all.

So hate on! I can’t wait for my honeymoon!!!

Post # 193
Member
230 posts
Helper bee

Goodness, what a cluster of a thread.

 

OP – your wording sounds good, but a little perky (a lot of exclamation points). Personally, I don’t think you need quite so much explanation, but that’s fine.

 

I’m mixed on honeyfunds but that’s neither here nor there. India is lovely – bring a LOT of immodium and be careful of your surroundings. As a female, don’t go out alone – I’m very, very well-traveled and India is the only place I’ve ever felt unsafe as a female alone.

 

Enjoy your honeymoon. Everyone else – calm down a little. It’s untraditional, but it’s not the tackiest thing I’ve ever heard.

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