- 6 years ago
- Wedding: September 2012
So it’s 2am and I’m stting in my car trying to cool off, first from a argument that went very bad very quickly and from doing 3 miles on the treadmill at the gym.
I’ve had a problem controlling my anger most of my life. However, I feel that I’ve made great advances in this area over the past few years. I know for a fact that I’m much much better at responding to people when I’m upset.
That being said, I have a hard time controlling myself, with the Fiance is the one that purposefully says something to make me angry.
I’ve never been the type to say or do something to someone JUST to upset them. If I’m upset, I just walk away. And have learned to ignore other people when they say things just to get a rise out of me…EXCEPT when it comes to the Fiance.
The back of the story, is that the person who got Fiance and I together, is a mutal friend of ours. She’s known us both, and it was a party at her house that we met and started dating. Now, friend X, and my Fiance used to date when they were in school together (almost 10 years ago). Long story short, he wasn’t interested in her for a serious relationship.
She’s been jealous from the start. Although she tries her best to play it off. She wanted to be my Maid/Matron of Honor, but knowing her, I decided to just make her a Bridesmaid or Best Man. Well a few weeks ago, after having commeted to being a Bridesmaid or Best Man, and me putting up 250 for her, as she promised to repay, she sent me a TEXT saying, she wouldn’t beable to be in the wedding.
One year, on New years eve, I had cooked for 8 hours preparring new years dinner for the Fiance and I family, and Friend X was there too. So New years day, I said I wasn’t cooking. Well friend X decided to cook breakfast for only HER and my Fiance (there were about 10 people in the house). I was upset about it, and was talking to Fiance privately about it, where he was trying to justify her actions, and she had the nerve to KNOCK on our CLOSED door to tell him his breakfast was ready. I was LIVID!
ALL, the other women at the house noticed it. I was the talk of the town for weeks. They were all saying that friend X was out of line, what they would have done, etc. However, with me trying to be better about my anger, I decided to not say anything but I would be sure to never let it happen again.
Fast forward 2 years to tonight. I felt like a maid this weekend. I washed clothes, cleaned the office, and deep cleaned the kitchen. While Fiance spent time with his father, and played games. Annoyed, but I said nothing.
Then tonight, he comes home and I prepare him dinner. He just sat at the dinner table, leaving me to bring him everything. I was like, “Okkkk, what you can’t help get anything, I feel like a maid”.
He was upset, and eventually said that friend X was a lady when she made him breakfast…… everything is a blur after that….
Typing all this has helped me see that the issue has been blown well out of porportion. However, I’m not over it. My anger is gone, but I’m still hurt that he compared me to her.