Post # 1
Hi guys! So if you saw my last post, we’re not engaged yet, but I know he has the ring 🙂 eek! Driving myself nuts trying to keep my mind busy with other things until the proposal happens. So far, so good.
Except… when I’ve told past brides that our engagement is going to be close to two years long, they think I’m nuts for many reasons… but I think it’s financially a good reason, AND we have family coming in from basically all over the world for this… so I feel like two years is a good plan, and good enough time in advance for people to be able to plan for it.
Anyone else in here with a two-year engagement (current or past)? Any words of wisdom would be great!
Post # 2
honeybee123: we had a 22 month engagement and when we first told people that we did get a handful of comments like “why so long!!?” and i just simply said, “this is what works for us”
here is why we had a long engagement:
-financially this helped us save money for both moving out and saving for the wedding. We didn’t live together. we lived with our parents until we got engaged and we moved in 7 months before the wedding. So we needed to save money to furnish our first apartment and save money for the wedding.
The benefit to having a long engagement is this gives you the opportunity to really enjoy the engagement period and take your time planning instead of just a year when a year really does fly by and you don’t realize it and end up rushing!
If you already live together, you can save up even more money. And two years really does fly by when planning a wedding.
I don’t think 2 years is a long time, i think once you start creeping into the 3 or 4 year mark, it seems long, but i would never ask someone why they are waiting so long. its honestly no ones business and it doesn’t matter why someone chooses to have a 1, 2 or 3 year engagement.
Post # 3
- Wedding: April 2017 - Hogarths, Solihull
Not quite 2 years, but ours is 19 months long. We’re 8 months into that now and I am so ready for it to be next year haha
Our reasons were:
– Timeline fitted with when we wanted to get Married. We’d always had our Anniversary in mind but thought this year would be too soon.
– Fiance had time to save for the ring.
– My Parents have had time to save for the Wedding (they’re paying)
2 years isn’t the longest engagement I’ve heard of and if it works for you then I can’t see the issue. It flies by and tbh if you start planning now you can more or less guarantee your first choice of suppliers, which is a bonus! 🙂
Post # 4
By the time my wedding comes in July 2017, we will have been engaged for 2 years. I get the same responses, with people thinking it is “too long”, but honestly it is what is best for us and our lives. And in the end, that is all that matters.
It is giving us plenty of time to save money and to get to do a lot of DIY as we have a small budget for the wedding. I know that we have our whole lives together, so why have to rush and do it all so quickly.
In the 10 months we have been engaged so far, I have already had 1 friend get engaged and married, and another one will happen a little later this year. And honestly, I have seen how crazy they have been trying to rush and put a wedding together, that I am happy we will have more time and not stressed about booking everything.
It has been fun getting to enjoy being engaged and getting to plan everything out together.
Post # 5
honeybee123: we will have a 22 month engagement by the time we are married in August. It was primarily for scheduling purposes, but ended up being a blessing in disguise!
I’m in medical school currently, so my schedule is not very flexible. I had to plan for the wedding to be during specific months where it wouldn’t conflict with residency interview season or certain clinical rotations.
Anyways, the positives of the long engagement: I’m VERY type A, so I’ve been able to thoroughly research all of our decisions. We’ve pretty much had good luck with vendor availability since we were searching well in advance. Financially, the extra time has been helpful for Fiance to save more $$, as I’m unable to pay for anything (yay med school loans…). I haven’t really felt stressed at all during the planning, because we have been able to spread our tasks out.
Plus, as a PP mentioned, it has just been fun to enjoy our time being engaged!
Post # 6
I’m in a similar position to you! Not engaged yet.. but he has the ring and promises the proposal is coming by end of the summer 🙂
We are having a 2-3 year engagement. I have one year left of my phD and his work is sending him to school this year for a 1 year masters program (We will both be finished with school Spring 2017.) We want to save up a little and not stress about wedding planning while we’re in school. It makes sense to us. 🙂
Post # 7
- Wedding: August 2015 - Carmen\'s Lakeview
honeybee123: We were engaged for 18 months and it was great! It’s so much less stressful when you can take your time to plan. It’s also great if you want to lose weight or for financial reasons 🙂
Post # 8
honeybee123: we had an almost 2.5 year engagement. Wouldn’t change it for anything. Gave us plenty of time to plan all little details- everything except paying for everything- ahead of time. We booked our venue about a year out and were first to book for the year, so no fighting for dates Or having to change anything. Dress shopping wasn’t super stressful, was able to Take my time. It was just nice to not have everything revolve around wedding planning the whole time. In the time we were engaged we were able to buy a house and that in itself was enough stress!
bottom line is it was more casual and we were able to spread out the stresses over time rather than crunch it all into a shorter time frame!
Post # 9
honeybee123: We aren’t engaged yet but I think she is asking me in Sept and we plan to get married Sept 2018. That will be 2 years almost to the day. 🙂
Unlike most brides I don’t want even $1 of debt. So we are having a destination wedding AND saving up two years to give our guests a trip to remember and a small reception when we get back.
I know it is a long time but when you are already going to spend your life with someone….I don’t think you should speed through the wedding and have a large amount of debt to start your family with.
Post # 10
Daizy914: 100% this! Ours will be 22 months as well and for the EXACT same reasons you’ve mentioned! Although I will say, our wedding is now less than 5 months away and I’m getting SO ANTSY I can’t even tell you! At THIS point I just want to be married already! Did you have a similar feeling the closer you got?! I’m practically jumping out of my skin.. And also because I’m really over all these stupid little things we have to do in the last two months!
Post # 11
honeybee123: By the time my fiance and I get married in August, we will have been engaged for 2 years and 3 months! He proposed at my college graduation (it was the cutest thing ever), but since he’s 1.5 years younger than me, he was still in college at the time. We didn’t want to get married until he was also done with school. This gave us plenty of time to save enough for our dream wedding, he got an amazing job right out of college, and we moved in together 5 months ago. We were able to book all of our dream vendors because we planned so far in advance. Basically, it was a great decision to have a long engagement and it worked out quite well for us!!
Post # 12
Our engagement will have been for a total of 33 months when we tie the knot next July. 🙂
We decided to make it that long because we needed time to save money so that we could really do it the way we want to with no regrets.
One thing to take note of when you have a really long engagement like this is that it gives you more time to obsess over minute and unimportant detail. You will toil over the dumbest things that no one will likely even notice (OR maybe thats just my type A personality shining through lol) because you will have more time to think about these things rather than having to make a quick and decisive decision.
BUT that being said, having such a long engagement has made everything fairly stress free (at least for now haha). We enjoyed several months of just being engaged and not planning our wedding which was absolutely lovely.
If it weren’t for the money saving, I would have preferred to keep our engagement right around the 1.5-2 year mark. I think thats plenty of time to plan a beautiful day… but we are finally inching closer to our one year mark so once that comes I’m sure time will fly and before we know it the day will be just a few months away and I’ll be panicking with so much stuff to do haha
Post # 13
We are having a 2.5 year engagement. We got all the comments of why so long as well.
I mainly have it so far away because me and my Fiance wanted a longer engagment to enjoy the process. Plus when my brother passed away a few years ago I gained a whopping 100 pounds in the grieiving process, so i’m hoping to get my body back for my wedding! LOL So far not going so great but I got a few years ;P
Post # 14
Cheekie0077: i had mixed feelings. i was excited, then i was anxious, then i was nervous. the day of, i actually had a panic attack- i was like “holy shit, i am getting married, we are going to be together forever, FOREVER” and at the same time im like uhhhh why are you freaking out? you have been with this man for 10 years lol
but then once i started walking down the aisle and i caught a glimpse of my husband i calmed down and got super giddy, like ridiculous. my poor husband was in tears and here i am laughing because I am so happy. I had to keep telling him i am not laughing at you, i am just so damn happy i feel high lol
Post # 15
By the time our big day rolls around we will have been engaged for 2+ years. We did this because of finances – we are saving up to buy a house (apartment renting together now), and so we can pay for the wedding ourselves. We have one daughter in college and two in elementary school so money is tight enough without rushing the stress of a wedding into it.
We’re just taking it slow. I’m doing some DIYs here and there in the mean time, but we’re not rushing anything and that’s just what I tell people…plus, our wedding date is our 5 year anniversary so we think it’ll be cool to have it then.