Looking for clarity.

posted 2 years ago in Relationships
Post # 121
3082 posts
Sugar bee

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beeyou10 :  You think he didnt plan that on purpose? At least you cant say he didnt remember your anniversary…. 

This poor girl he has duped is just his pawn. Maybe it will go somewhere, maybe it wont but right now, he is using her to get to you.

Does that make it hurt less? not really. But maybe in time it will when you realize how sad and patheic his attempt really is. 


Post # 122
1037 posts
Bumble bee

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beeyou10 :  

They probably thought they were doing you a favour, but more likely your friends and family just wanted to indulge in a bit of gossip and scandal. I’m sorry to say this, but this is how people are. I mean no disrespect to your loved ones – my family and friends, whom I love dearly, are no different. They get all indignant on your behalf and get a bit caught up in the drama of it themselves and don’t realise they are hurting you by keeping it all going.

If I were you, I would say, very nicely but very firmly, that you don’t want any more updates about him/ his new life/ his girlfriend etc. And just don’t talk to them about it.

Find one or two trusted friends or family members to confide in, and talk to your therapist about it.

I really recommend this otherwise it is going to turn into a community drama, and that will just make you feel worse. The classiest thing (and the best thing for yourself) that you can do is ignore his behaviour.

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