(Closed) Looking for school/work/life advice (long sorry)

posted 7 years ago in Career
Post # 3
Member
3620 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I can see why you’re confused. I went through some of the same feelings, though my situation was slightly different. I made the decision to go to grad school based on the fact that I wasn’t READY to move on from the “school” lifestyle that I enjoyed. My friends/family were nearby, which helped that decision too. And the job market sucked at the time (not unlike today). In the end, it paid off, because even though my degree was in Justice Studies, just having my masters got me a higher paying job in healthcare, despite the degree not really pertaining to the job. Good luck, things will work out – even if you don’t end up teaching at a university, your degree will set you apart from other candidates. It’s scary, but you’re doing something good for yourself.

Post # 4
Member
5096 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Do you mind if I ask what field you’re in? You don’t have to say the exact field, but it might help knowing if it’s humanities, sciences, or social sciences.

Post # 5
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

I started to write a long drawn out response, then deleted because it wouldn’t really help.

Basically, I am now working in a field where college won’t help me make any more money. I can make really good money without it.  So, I’m REALLY glad I decided to take a year off before getting my MBA, and found this job in that time. I am so over school!!

I would also like to know what field you are studying. Have you thought about going to career fairs, and trying to see what else is out there in your area? You might be able to find something else while you are in school, and then figure it out from there

Post # 6
Member
14495 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Wow, that is a quandary.  Personally in your situation I would stick it out.  Now, having said that, if you left the program are you going to look back in ten years and think woulda, coulda, shoulda?  I know that you said that your program is going in a direction that you don’t want, but will it get you to the point that you want in five, ten, and twenty years down the road?  Can you imagine raising a family while you are doing what you are doing?  Will it afford you the time for baseball games and dance recitals?  At what age will it allow you to retire?  Will you look back when retired and think “I accelled at my career and family”?

I can tell you that I had a great career for many years, to be honest, for my field my degree was a waste of time.  I was great at working and saving money for retirement, but in the long run, I screwed up.  I wish that I had made more time for the baseball games and being more involved with the school activities.  My son is now 18, in school and prepairing for the military life, but I feel like I missed so much so that I could have a career.  Now that I am married and the step son is going to high school, career oportunities have pop back up but I have said no to them.  Actually I am looking at part time work now in two fields that will allow me to make it to every football game and be apart of the booster club at school.

So I think the best thing for you to do now is to imagine yourself in thiry years and ask yourself how you want to look back at your life.  Ask the older self the hard questions and answer them realistically.  There is going to be your answers.

 

Post # 8
Member
5763 posts
Bee Keeper

I think the bottom line is that you don’t sound one bit happy and maybe all this worrying is telling you something you might not be ready to hear or change. It also sounds like you’re doing what you THINK you should be doing and not what your head and heart really want.

Probably 30+ years ago, some guru told women they could have it all and juggle everything successfully. Some can,but many can’t. Something has to give. I always knew that family was and would always be the most important thing to me,so my decision was an easy one. You sound torn.

One of my friends told me just a few weeks ago that one of her patients teaches at a local university in a program for people wanting to be college professors (?). She went on to say she felt so guilty even teaching the course knowing there were NO JOBS out there,especially since most professors were tenured. What will they do upon graduation? Keep going to school since they can’t find a job? A few of my friends were like that,just playing around to avoid being in the real world. I didn’t understand it then, and I still don’t now.

Sometimes you just have to take the plunge and move on. Living with the fear that you might make the wrong choice will get you nowhere.

Post # 9
Member
834 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@Amaryllis: I don’t think there is any such thing as “overqualification”. Are you really passionate about teaching? I wouldn’t quit school just yet, and you should definitely talk to your Fiance about how all this is making you feel. (Even if you already have)

What do you enjoy the most about your field of study? Do you still enjoy it at all? If you don’t have a passion for it, then maybe it’s just not the right field for you.

Post # 10
Member
834 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@ItWasntMe: I agree. Taking these risk are just part of life. You can’t sit on the fence wondering, because you’ll never know unless you try. If you don’t try, you may regret it. School can be helpful, if you want a higher-paying, office-type job. Sadly, with jobs like teaching, there are so little spots available because of tenure. Not to mention with more and more job cuts, there will be even less positions or options. There are however, a shortage of skilled laborers. Basically, everyone has it drilled into their skull that they have to have an education and a white collar job, but that just isn’t true. We need welders, we need mechanics, and other similar jobs. Without skilled labor, “civilized” life, as we know it, just isn’t possible.

Post # 11
Member
133 posts
Blushing bee

Can you do some TA-ing or teaching at the school or even private tutoring, while still getting your degree? This way, you could gain some teaching experience (and recommendations), while still getting the PhD and keeping yourself fully funded. 

The topic ‘Looking for school/work/life advice (long sorry)’ is closed to new replies.

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