Post # 16
we have been getting some questioning like that too (“when will you be engaged??”) and I think that’s actually adding to his pressure! He told me he doesn’t want to be that guy who plans something and everyone says “Oh he’s going to propose.” He wants it to be a total surprise for everyone, and it’s really just not. I tried to explain that to him – we’re committed and established, so no one will be amazed that we got engaged. I think he’s disappointed that it can’t be more of a surprise, but he gets it more now.
I wish people wouldn’t ask so pointedly! He even has a coworker who has been asking him for all kinds of details about it and told him he needs to do it soon or she’ll “have a talk with him.” She’s an older, married woman and I think it hasn’t even occurred to her that she’s being pushy.
Post # 17
Good question, what takes these men so long? Ok, you love me, you want to marry me, let’s wait a million years…
NOT!!! I’m in an akward pre-engagement phase too, it sucks. It’s always on my mind…ugh!
Post # 18
You’re so right, once you’re completely committed people will start to ask about/expect engagement! My poor SO is getting it from every angle, his parents, his sister, my parents, literally ALL of our friends and even his boss and he always says the same thing about wanting it to be a surprise and completely unexpected but sadly with how long it’s taken him we can’t even go out to dinner without people saying “oooooooh I bet tonight’s the night!”.
Post # 19
“I’m in an akward pre-engagement phase too, it sucks. It’s always on my mind…ugh!”
Seriously! I’m glad I’m not the only one that always has it on my mind. I feel like an insane person. Like why can’t I go one day, or even a few hours without thinking about this? And the longer I’m waiting the worse it gets.
Why does it become such an obsession? Especially once he said he is definitely going to propose. You’d think it’d be easier to relax then, but nope. Any theories on this phenomenon? Maybe if I understood why it happens I could stop lol.
Post # 20
I wish knew! I thought the same thing – that once I knew, I would be so much more relaxed. Nope.
Post # 21
Maybe it’s some kind of evolution mechanism in the female brain or something. Lol