(Closed) lost it =(

posted 8 years ago in Rings
Post # 3
Member
1986 posts
Buzzing bee

Sorry, thats gotta be rough!

Post # 4
Member
5388 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

Sorry to hear that.

Post # 5
Member
5657 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2012

That’s terrible! Sorry that happened to you… perhaps you could get a replacement?

Post # 7
Member
5657 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2012

You could pick one yourself and budget it together? Did you express to him that this is something that means something to you? If not, he may not realize that it matters so much to you.

Post # 8
Member
529 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I’m so sorry !

I know nothing will ever replace “the one” but if you are marrying in September, you will have a wedding band soon !

Post # 10
Member
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

yikes!  i gotta ask if you dont mind saying, how did you lose his mothers ring???

in the meantime you asked him and he said he doesnt have the money – what do you expect him to do if he said he cant afford it?  go into debt??    why dont you two finance this together?  i never understood why it has to be 100% the guys responsibility if its the woman that wants it sooner/or bigger/expensive/upgraded

 

Post # 12
Member
158 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

IMO he may still be feeling a little hurt because you lost his mother’s ring.  Even though it wasn’t your fault (and he knows it) the ring still represented your love and the love that his parents have or had.  It is difficult to replace such nastalgia.  Try to have a talk about why he chose that ring and what it means to him and try to get him to open up so he can feel better, move on, and stop being passive.  He has a wound and it sounds like it may still need to be healed.  Honor his feelings.  Men are prideful and typically don’t want to talk about emotions and feelings, etc.  Stop talking about the ring that you want and get him talking about the importance of the ring that was misplaced.  I bet you’ll get a ring a lot sooner that way.  Good luck!

Post # 13
Member
325 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Geez, I’m sorry to hear that.  Even though I know it wouldn’t be the same – but was it not insured?

Post # 14
Member
10366 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

@cyndistar3: He just blew all his money….? You know that money is the #1 cause of fighting and divorce, right? It might be worthwhile to actually sit down with a financial advisor and chart a savings course for the future. The fact that he can’t afford ANY ring is really concerning. If you can’t afford a ring, how will you set aside money for an emergency fund? What about saving for your retirement? Your kid’s college fund?

Post # 15
Hostess
18637 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I’m sorry.  Can the two of you budget for it together?  Even something smaller?  I think that the two of you need a serious money talk.  The fact that he blew all his money really worries me.

Post # 16
Member
4546 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I agree with some of the other Bees that it’s a bit concerning he blew all his money. There’s no way you two could agree on some ring so you could feel like you had an engagement ring? Maybe just as a placeholder until you get your wedding ring or you guys can afford something else?

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