(Closed) Lost Job and became engaged in same week and too upset to enjoy it

posted 9 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
253 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I’m so sorry.  I know that NEPA isn’t the easiest place to find a job, and I hope something good comes up for you very soon.  Have you thought about volunteering someplace in the meantime?  If it’s related to your field, you can use it to keep current, and if it’s not in your field at least it’s new skills, experiences, and something to do while you search.

As far as your Fiance goes, I hope he’s being supportive and trying to help you to the extent he can.  The last thing you need to worry about right now is what impression you’re making on him, or whether he respects you less because you were let go.  Especially with the economy being the way it is…

I’m sorry I don’t have better suggestions, but I just wanted to send you a hug.  Hang in there, it WILL get better. 

Post # 4
326 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I don’t have a whole lot of advice, just well wishes! My sister and a good friend both recently struggled to find jobs despite being well-qualified, but there is light at the other end of the tunnel. I agree–volunteering someplace between filling out applications is a great idea. If there aren’t really volunteer opportunities in your field (I know there aren’t in mine ^_^), volunteer at hospitals, nursing homes, whatever.

I think the worst part about being unemployed is how worthless you can feel when you know you have so much to offer. You DO have a lot to offer and you will get another job. Until then, volunteer and help other people who might also be having a hard time.

Best of luck! πŸ˜€ 

Post # 6
57 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

I heard some good advice somewhere. To paraphrase, it was "focus on activity, not results." Every job application you fill out and every networking event you go to is activity. Even if nothing comes of it, you put your best foot forward.

Post # 7
2144 posts
Buzzing bee

I know a bit of how you feel. Through our short engagement (from proposal to wedding date it’ll be 7mos) my fiance nearly lost his job (his work place closed, luckily he was one of 3 people they offered a position to at their other location, though for a couple weeks we thought he’d be jobless). Then, just about a month ago, I was told that the family I work for is moving (I’m a nanny) so the first week of June is my last dates to work, just a week after the wedding and honeymoon! I’m sure your fiance understands so don’t stress about that part. If he didn’t love you for you and not your job, you two wouldn’t be getting married! I agree that you should volunteer πŸ™‚ Maybe you can volunteer for an animal shelter or something. Ask them if you could write the description of their animals up for adoption to post on their website!

Post # 8
2470 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I got laid off and a week later Fiance got a job across the country. (We got engaged after both of these events). It’s VERY scary. I’m terrified I won’t find a job and I’m not having much luck sending out my resume right now. However, I’ve been in this boat before and it is true what people say, its easier to find a job when you live in the city. I’m hoping that now since I have a local CA address, I’ll get a better response.

It’s frustrating when you know you are qualified (or even over qualified in some cases). I have a master’s degree from one of the top schools in my field, I have good experience and great references, yet its just tough to get your foot in the door. My best advice is to stay confident and see if you can get part-time work that is somehow related to your field. I am in PR so I got a job doing marketing and PR for a small business for the time between my lay off and the move. It helps keep gaps minimized on the resume, and you can become fresh on the trends.

Post # 9
27 posts

Hang in there! I completely empathize with your situation as I know that my career success was something my fiance really respected. There were a few times he made comments to "well, you’re not working so…" indicating that he felt my time was less valuable now that I am unemployed. I think just really making an effort to find a job and talking to him about your process and ups and downs and communicating in general just really help you both get through this time together.

It was really tough for the first couple of months, the ego took a big hit and he wasn’t necessarily there to support me fully. I’m lucky that my family and friends have kind of made up for it and been extra supportive. I think the process has been a good one though, to know that we can make it through a tough time together and see how each other reacts. The road isn’t always going to be smooth and trying to look on the bright side, making it through this challenge early on has ultimately strengthened our relationship for the long-term.

Post # 10
372 posts
Helper bee

Oh no!  I am so sorry to hear you are going through this, and I know how you feel.  I learned that our firm was closing about a week before I got engaged – my fiance had actually been planning it beforehand and proposed during the first time I was in a decent mood after getting the news.  It took about 6 weeks before I was let go and even though I knew it was coming all I could do was cry b/c my whole identity is wrapped up in my career!  Hang in there, it will get better!


One other thing – if you are a writer, look on talentzoo.com for jobs, you could try being a copywriter for an ad agency.  It’s not glamourous, but it generally pays well.  If that is something you would be interested in PM me and I will send you some headhunter info. 

Post # 11
250 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I live in the NEPA area… I know the situation can be bleak around here, even in the best of times, so I feel your pain. πŸ™

A couple things, since you say your experience lies in writing/editing… the magazine Highlights for Children actually has their offices in the area, so I would hit them up if you haven’t already. I was a writing major in college and I applied there abotu 3 years ago. In addition, a lot of larger companies do have offices around here because we have the intersection of 2 major highways 80 & 81. I know Amazon.com has distribution center south of where I live. Not sure who might be hiring or for what positions, but it never hurts to ask. The best thing I found was to look in ALL categories online, because I found technical writer positions listed under fields like the medical industry.

If I can be of more assistance, please PM me! good luck!

The topic ‘Lost Job and became engaged in same week and too upset to enjoy it’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors