Post # 1
This weekend was the worst weekend of my life. I had to say goodbye to my beloved Bentley. He was a 12 yr old yorkie-maltese who had the spirit of a puppy. I’ve had him since I was 16. He grew up with me, he was there for a huge part of my life, & most importantly he was my best friend. He was the one thing that always brought a smile to my face and I hope I brought as much joy to his life as he brought to mine. Bentley was the first real pet that I owned and it is so hard trying to get by without him. The worst part of the situation is that he was perfectly fine all morning; he appeared to be the perfectly happy healthy dog that he always was. I took him for a short walk as we normally did and a few hours later he just fell over, lost control of his body for a bit, then when he did walk he was very unsteady. He lost control of his bladder & he eventually went to lay on his bed. I actually thought he was getting better but shortly after I noticed he started to breathe heavy. Within minutes he was gone. The whole thing happened so fast I didnt have much time to do anything. But that is the hard part to swallow- I feel as if I didnt do anything for him. He had fallen over similarly like that a few months prior – I had rushed him right to the vet then & the vet did nothing. She said it was probably some vascular nonsense and that he would get better which he did right away. Assuming this was initially the same thing I didn’t rush him right away because I assumed it was the same thing and he would get better- this time he did not. I’m trying to stay positive and know that he was with me and I was there comforting him, that he was at home and comfortable in his own bed and it happened naturally. I wish that I could erase those last few minutes from my mind – seeing him take his last breath. I keep trying to tell myself that it will get better each day but right now its hard to believe. My house feels so empty without him, I feel empty without him. I’m getting married in less than 2 mo & I wanted more than anything for him to be there the morning of my wedding- he always slept in my bed with me so it’s just not going to be the same. I am no longer excited for my wedding & I just want him back. Anyone who has lost a pet & has gone through the same thing a few words of encouragement would help.
Post # 3
Im so sorry. You gave him an awesome life and you were with him until the very end which was the best thing you could have done for him.
Big, big hugs xx
Post # 4
So sorry you had to say goodbye to Bentley. I lost my 17-year-old cat earlier this year. It all happened very suddenly one weekend and I was with her when she passed. For the weeks that followed my mind kept going to those last awful moments. Thankfully, with time, my memories were replaced with the happier times. You will get there too.
Take some time off if you can and reflect on your memories with Bentley. Look at old pictures, watch videos, and cry. It will get better.
Post # 5
OP, I’m so sorry. I lost my beloved Yorkie of 15 years 4 months before my wedding. I had her since I was 16. If Bentley could talk to you right now, he would tell you to live your life as happy and fulfilling as you can be, because that’s all he wants for you. He wants you to remember him as the happy, running puppy he was in your eyes and to only remember happy memories when you think of him. He will be devastated if he was the cause of alll this sadness in your life right now. He wants. That’s all dogs ever want. For their best friends to be happy and carry on their memories with joy. It also gives him a lot of comfort to know that although he’s not physically around to accompany and love you, your Fiance will be there for you. He will be watching you from afar and protecting you.
Post # 6
I am so so sorry. I can’t imagine the pain you must be feeling. You gave him a good life and you will never forget him, and that is a beautiful thing. Cry it out and know that he will always be in your heart. Thinking of you and sending hugs.
Post # 7
I am so sorry Bee. I also lost my dog a few months before my wedding. I was so heartbroken that I didn’t get to take pictures with him in a little bowtie that day.
It is so sad that it came out of nowhere like that. However, it is wonderful that he didn’t suffer for long. This is much better than had he been sick for months. He got to pass peacefully, instead of being put down in a vet’s office. It ended as good as it could have.
Soon enough you will start to feel better and some day you will think of him and smile. Try to distract yourself in your wedding planning. I know you’re no where near ready for a new puppy, but maybe get a fish tank or something to distract you and help the house feel a little less alone.
Darling Husband and I got a puppy from the shelter once I started feeling better after my loss. Give it a few weeks, then start getting excited for your wedding, new life as a married couple, and what kind of pet you and your new husband will get together. 🙂
I am so sorry Bee. I think these things just take time. It’ll get better.
Post # 8
- Wedding: April 2015 - City Hall NYC
I am so sorry for your loss 🙁
Post # 9
I’m so sorry, OP. Losing a member of your family is always heartbreaking and unfortunately it takes a bit of time to process the shock and feelings that come with it. I’m sure you’ll never forget how hard it has been to lose Bentley, but I promise that with a bit of time you’ll find you focus more on all the happy and fun memories you had together, and those last few minutes will not define his life. Try to just take it one day at a time and allow yourself this time to grieve.
For what it’s worth, it sounds like his passing was very peaceful. I think being spared a rush trip to the vet or any upsetting interventions that wouldn’t have changed the outcome would have been a blessing for him. Animals are so unpredictable when they are unwell and more often than not these types of issues tend to resolve themselves, especially in older animals when they are not entirely unexpected, so I completely understand why you wouldn’t have instantly whisked him off to the vet. I think you responded the way 95% of pet owners would have, and that your actions gave Bentley the most dignified and comfortable transition he could have asked for.
Don’t waste any precious energy having regrets over how things unfolded. You shared an amazing life with Bentley and he was clearly lucky to have you. Take good care of yourself. Sending lots of love.
Post # 10
- Wedding: September 2015 - Hotel Ballroom
I have two fur babies myself, and the thought of losing either of them makes my skin crawl! I am so sorry for your loss *hug*
Post # 11
I’m so sorry. It’s really like losing a family member/best friend when you lose a fur baby. Especially your first. Thinking of you.
Post # 12
I am so sorry for the loss of such a beloved family member. Please allow your self time to grieve. Try to focus on the good memories and know that you gave Bentley a wonderful home. He will forever be a part of your heart. I am truely sorry. So many hugs and prayers sent to you and your family.
Post # 13
I am really sorry for your loss. It’s so hard to lose a pup because they are so very special! I think we always feel we could’ve done more but you were there for him when he needed you the most. I know it might not seem like much, but the first time I lost a dog someone said to me, “It WILL get better.” And somehow that gave me hope that I wouldn’t feel that misery forever. And she was right.
I am NOT suggesting this, just telling my story. I ended up getting another dog a few weeks later. I just HAD to have a 4 legged critter to love. It was no disrepect to the dog I had just lost, as a matter of fact, it was partially to honor him by rescuing another dog. Now I’ve said goodbye to that dog. It’s still hard. I still haven’t put away or even washed her doggie blanket. I have it folded up on the shelf on my nightstand. I am JUST now (2 years later) about ready to wash it. Weird, but true.
Post # 14
I am so sorry for your loss. I lost 4, yes 4 dogs in a 12 month period. Two to unstoppable cancer, one to age (she was 17) and one to a fight (instigated by him, long story). Anyway what kept me going is that I was there with them when they passed, was able to comfort them and knew that I had given them all the best lives possible. Hold on to your sweet memories.
Post # 15
So deeply sorry for your loss. You were there with him at the end, he heard your voice last. Had he been at the vet office he might not have been with you. Big hugs to you.