(Closed) Lost my MOH

posted 9 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
3010 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

What an absolutely horrible thing to go through.  I am truly sorry to hear this is happening to you, your daughter, and to your entire family.  I do not believe that a 2 year old would say anything like that if it weren’t true.  I understand that your sister is upset, but she also has to understand that she would do the absolute same if the situation was reversed.  I sincerely hope this is resolved sooner than later.  Please don’t blame yourself for anything regarding this situation.  You did nothing wrong.  You were only trying to protect your little girl.

You are in my thoughts and prayers.  I wish you the best of luck.

Post # 5
Member
2512 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I am SO SORRY that you and your family are going through this. It is horrible.

Don’t feel guilty because you did nothing wrong. As a mother, my heart is truly breaking for you. This has to be so tough.

Please do not let your family’s actions towards you change your stance. You continue doing what is right for your little girl. Thankfuly your Fiance is supportive of you.

For your wedding, I think that you should try to celebrate the love between you and your Fiance the way you see fit. Extend an invite to your sister you would like her there. If she declines, do not feel guilty. Remember that your wedding day is about you and your Fiance not about anyone else.

Best of luck to you.

Post # 6
Member
1391 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I absolutely think you did the right thing. If my 3 year old came to me and said that I would have to take her word on it. I am so sorry you are going through being the “outcast” for it. You were just being a good mother to her. If you hadn’t done anything and something worse happened you would have blamed yourself for it. You did right by your daughter and that’s what’s important. Your sister could possibly be feeling ashamed/embarassed about the whole thing. I hope it gets better.

Post # 7
Member
1962 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I am so sorry that you have to deal with this.  You have every right to keep your child away from him.  I’m happy that you are taking what your child said seriously.  I’ve been physically abused/sexually harrassed and nobody believed me.  Sometimes I think people try to believe the best in a family member and can’t see signs of an abuser because they don’t want to.  Have you thought of seeking some help as well?  When you take your daughter they may be able to help you find a way to bridge communication with your family.

Post # 8
Member
9816 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

Forget losing your Maid/Matron of Honor, that’s not even important whatsoever compared to what you child is dealing with. You’re doing what you have to do. Counseling is a great idea.

Post # 12
Member
241 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

I am so sorry you are going through this. You absolutely did the right thing, and yet you are treated like the ‘bad guy.’

It horrifies me that a molestation charge won’t be investigated if there was no lasting physical damage. So it only counts if it is violent?? What a load of bull.

Post # 13
Member
3165 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

<3 stay strong, it sounds like you know what you’re doing and it’s definitely the right thing.

Post # 14
Member
1962 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

View original reply
@browniebride  I’m happy that you are all doing counseling together.  Please don’t stress over wishing you had done something to prevent it.  You are doing everything you can to protect your little girl now and that’s all that matters.  I’m happy that she has such a loving and understanding mother as you.  Hopefully the sessions will help with what happened to you in the past too.  I just supressed everything and never really sought help.  My abuser came into my work a few months ago and I lost it.  I never thought anybody would believe me anyway since it was my step-dad and he was a cop.  Stay strong.  If you don’t mind I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.

Post # 15
Member
315 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

The world nees more moms like you.  You are standing up for your daughter and you are absolutely in the right.  How could you ever trust your nephew again around any of your children? How could your family expect you to?

 

I wish your nephew was in prison.  That is horrible, and the worst part is that since he got away with it once, he will probably do it again since molesters often are repeat offenders.  Also, it’s worth asking where he learned that kind of behavior… no offense but it seems like your family has some issues with molesting.  Chances are there are other family members who did something similar to him, so if I were you, I’d just keep my kids away from them, period.

Post # 16
Member
315 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

View original reply
@Oh, and maybe look into a destination wedding? Go on vacation with your Fiance and your daughter and have a great time in Mexico or somewhere.  Just relax and forget all of this for awhile.

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