(Closed) Lost the Christmas Challenge last night :(

posted 8 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
4765 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2011 - Vintage Villas

I’m sorry that happened! Don’t get discouraged, though. Just because you brought it up once doesn’t mean that you can’t start the challenge back over! If you really feel like it’s something you need to discuss with him, then you should try to have a calm and rational discussion with him, and then leave it alone after that.

Post # 4
Member
2513 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

Awww – I’m sorry you’re sad! I know how much it sucks to try to keep quiet about it, so you don’t drive them crazy, but then you feel like you’re going nuts at the same time!

On a positive note, it is smart that he doesn’t want to finance the ring (& WOW – that must be an AWESOME ring if he’s willing to spend that much on it! 🙂 so you will not have to worry about that debt when you do get married, but like we discussed earlier in another thread, when that’s what you want for Christmas, and then you hear that’s not what you’re getting, it is crushing. Been there, done that, got the t-shirt.

Hang in there, and don’t worry about blowing the Christmas challenge, just challenge yourself each day to remain calm and know that it is coming!

Post # 5
Member
654 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

waterprincess – I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU ARE GOING THROUGH! Even though I am married now, (legally, ceremony is next year) I still dont have an engagement ring. WHY? Because he said he wants to pay in full and he doesnt want to do layaway or finance it. We had this problem before we got married! It drove me crazy!! All I can say is be patient. if you push him for it- he wont want to buy it at all. Have you considered getting engaged with no ring? and then you buy the ring? a ring shouldnt stop you from starting your future together 🙂

Post # 7
Member
603 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

(((((((WATERPRINCESS))))))))

Dont feel bad, I lost the Christmas challenge after a week lol. I know that what he said about your Christmas gift is rough to hear, but at least he is being smart about his money and that he saving for that dream ring of yours!!

I learned a lesson today that I want to share with you: We are soooo lucky to have such great guys as our SO’s. After talking with my best friends the past few days (who were both recently dumped and left heartbroken, and one just found out she has cancer), I realized that me complaining about a ring to them probably makes them feel like crap and that I should feel lucky just to have my man and my health. CHerish the fact that you are in love and that you are on your way to pre-engagement land :)))

Post # 8
Member
2695 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

Don’t be so hard on yourself for talking to him about it.  If you hadn’t then on Christmas day you’d be so uptight that you’d probably have said something you’d later regret.  Besides at least you know now that he has a plan.

When I was in this stage a friend told me that she had the most fun in the almost engaged stage knowing that it was all going to happen soon and to enjoy this time because the wedding planning can get stressful.

Post # 9
Member
1280 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

awww waterprincess! seriously, don’t be so hard on yourself! you were totally in your right to bring it up, and at least now you know his plans. honestly, it’s probably better in the long run for him to pay for the ring in cash – at least it won’t be hanging over your heads and you can start planning a wedding without any ring debt! especially since you are still in school. i know it’s easier said than done, but try to enjoy your holidays anyway – it seems like your man is totally committed to you and that’s awesome!

Post # 10
Member
3587 posts
Sugar bee

((((((((((waterprincess)))))))) I don’t have any advice, I just wanted to give you a hug!

Post # 11
Member
8353 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2011

Sorry you are going through this, but have you thought about letting him know that the ring you picked out doesn’t have to be the one? You could always get a ring that costs much less and then upgrade at a later date; after you are married.

Post # 12
Member
1303 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Awwwww don’t worry…there isn’t a day that goes by where I don’t lose the challenge.

Post # 14
Member
603 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Girl I am the same way, I want to get married and start having a family..its so frustrating to have to wait on someone else to start the life I want!

Post # 15
Member
3063 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I know how you feel I’ve been trying my hardest to keep my mouth shut tight too but some days I just want to throw a tantrum like a 3 year old and pull my hair out! Hopefully you won’t have to wait too much longer… it is sweet that he’s saving up to get you something amazing though! Have a good Holiday season

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