(Closed) Love him! Hate his family.

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
Post # 2
Member
3 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: July 2016

You’re not marrying his family.

They will not and should not be participants in your marriage. They’re family and you can choose when and where to spend time with them. 

Set boundaries early on. 

Post # 3
Member
4238 posts
Honey bee

View original reply
MsSassyBee23:  +1

It also doesn’t hurt to move away. ijs

 

Post # 4
Member
49 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2016

Yup, move away.  

Does your husband understand your perspective? it makes it easier if you both view the situation the same. Otherwise you’ll be at odds With him and his family. 

Post # 5
Member
394 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

View original reply
tkmw104:  I think you are over-reacting. you are lucky enough to have found someone who you want to spend the rest of your life with, he feels the same and you want to throw it all away because of his family? Try being a little fair, as loug and rowdy his family may seem, remember they are the same people who have raised your guy which means they must have done something right to give you a guy like that?

It’s just a fairy tale concept where women get amazing inlaws. You are fortunate to have a man of your dreams right beside you. Don’t waste your life on being negative about his family. Accept them for who they are and be happy for what you have.

Post # 6
Member
106 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

My family are loud, stressful, uneducated and sometimes rude. I sometimes have a lot of pain from stress of them. I am nothing like them I want completly different things getting educated even after a bad up bringing, negativity all my life etc. You say your Fiance isn’t like them either but you would go to the extent of leaving him because of them really? they are still his family and he cant change that. If i’m honest you sound so stuck up. Yes my family stress me out (which family doesn’t) they also stress my Fiance out, we have even talked about moving away. But if my Fiance was on here saying the stuff you are i would be seriously pissed. My advice, don’t let them get to you just let it go or let him deal with it they dont have to have anything to do with you only your Fiance if he wants it. Running away isn’t going to get rid of them. Also I try not to say stuff about my family to my Fiance as i dont want him getting stressed and that way I to can also forget about it when im with him.

Post # 7
Member
5944 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2014

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tkmw104:  My mom always said, “You don’t just marry the man, you marry the family.” It’ll depend on how far away you can keep them and if your Fiance is on board with that.

Post # 8
Member
1056 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

I think the whole ” you dont just marry him, you marry his family” really depends on the boundaries you and your Fiance will draw with his family. I can not stand my fiances family. They act like they are entitled to everything just because they have money and go to church every Sunday. His Mom is SO nice to my face but when I leave she bashes me to everyone.. including my fi. I do not come from a wealthy family and she has flat out said because I do not come from a wealthy family i will not be a good mother. She is just nasty. The best advice I can recommend is make sure you create boundaries now..

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