Post # 1
I’ve literally just learned about this ‘love languages’ thing – I found it really interesting and took the quiz (google it if you haven’t ever taken it before!).
9 Physical Touch
8 Acts of Service
8 Words of Affirmation
3 Quality Time
2 Receiving Gifts
Haha I feel like “acts of service” makes it sound like I want Fiance to be my slave!!!! I’m going to get him to take this quiz to see how we match up!
So just curious – anyone else have similar scores to their SO/FI or know it without doing a quiz?! If you don’t, how do you deal/manage it within your relationship to keep things healthy?
Made Fiance take this quiz (it was like pulling teeth!!). Looks like we are relatively similar –
9 Acts of Service
9 Physical Touch
8 Quality Time
4 Words of Affirmation
0 Receiving Gifts
Post # 2
Mine is Gifts (surprise, surprise) and his is Acts of Service. They’re basically diametrically opposed, haha.
Post # 3
I can’t remember the numbers but I know we both scored quite highly in the gifts section lol. Darling Husband also has words of affirmation which is one of my smaller categories. There’s a related one about the language of apologies too which helped us explain some bits. I would definitely recommend love languages, it’s so easy to see how we’re showing live to our SOs and so important.
Post # 4
oooh thanks – will have to take that one next!
Post # 5
I love the love languages! Mine are physical touch and words of affirmation while my husband’s are acts of service and quality time. He never took the quiz, but he told me just from my explaining the different love languages to him.
It is something I always keep in the back of my mind since we do have different love languages. So when he shows me physical affection, it means more to me because I know it’s not his innate way to show love. Conversely, I have to make an effort to make sure I show him love in his love language rather than my own all the time.
Post # 6
Reading the book really helps with identifying which languages you truly are. I took the quiz for fun and scored differently than when I read the book. Also another key way to recognize which ones you are…..how you show love. If you are very touchy feely or service oriented towards your SO that’s a good indicator of how you want to be loved. You’ll show love in the ways that you want to be loved, which is often why there ends up being problems unless you are with someone who has the same languages as you. Then you wont have to work quite as hard at showing the other love because you’ll do it naturally.
I am gifts (sounds superficial, but it could really be any ol’ thing) and quality time
Fi is touch and words of affirmation
I grew up in a non-touching home and we also don’t really express verbally that we love each other so I’ve REALLY struggled with making sure my fi knows he’s loved. It’s easy for me to buy him gifts constantly and spend time with him but he feels most loved by the way I tell him and also by hugging, hand holding, kissing, etc. He has to really make it a point to spend quality time with me and bring me little gifts (flowers, love notes, etc).
Post # 7
that’s really sweet 🙂 we are getting married next year and I’m just trying to absorb as much advice/tips as possible from bees who are in long and healthy marriages!
Post # 8
I got Gifts (explains why I buy people gifts for almost any occasion) and Quality Time. Fiance got Physical Touch and Quality Time.
I used to get frustrated when he wasn’t the type to plan elaborate surprises (I am this way) for birthdays or whatever until we took this quiz and now I am more understanding haha
Post # 9
My was gifts and Physical touch.
My Fiance is acts of service and phsical touch. It helps me understand us both better. Latley I wonder if qulity time is one of mine. but maybe it’s just us being busy.
Post # 10
Ours were very similar!
Mine: 11 physical touch, 8 quality time, 5 words of affirmation, 4 acts of service, 2 gifts
His: 11 physical touch, 9 quality time, 5 words of affirmation, 5 acts of service, 0 gifts
Post # 11
It’s nice that you are simiar!! I am Quality Time and Darling Husband is Physical Touch and Words of Affirmation. It was tough at first getting used to each other’s love styles and figuring out how to show each other love, but it’s second nature now.
Post # 12
Acts of Service was number one for us both. Words of Affirmation was 2nd for me, but way down there on his list.
We took this quiz earlier in our relationship and in all honesty I believe it really helped us understand one another better.
Post # 13
wow!!! you guys are REALLY similar! cblank181:
and you too. I’m glad I’ve done this now and when he wakes up from his nap (long day!) I can share the results with him 🙂
I guess they can change over time – I hadn’t thought of that. Do you think you will ever become more aligned with your SO? Is that even a thing?
Post # 14
ahh that’s cute 🙂 I definately am generally not a tactile person (like, I only started hugging my brother on special occasions about 2 years ago!) and it usually makes me feel quite uncomfortable. FI’s family are very big on hugs, however, and that always made me feel really welcome especially when I was first getting to know them. Maybe I’ll have to invest in the book to see if that’s an accurate reflection of me?!
Post # 15
I think it’s definitely possible! I think especially now that it’s easier for me to communicate using his love languages, I am also more receptive to those love languages, and I think same for him. It would be interesting to retake the quiz!