Post # 1
Welp, the title is pretty self-explanatory, but to reiterate: I have six amazing women in my life who I’ve asked to be my bridesmaids. I love each of them dearly and can’t prioritize one over the other. I briefly entertained the idea of having one Matron of Honor and one or two Maids of Honor, but I think that might backfire and just make the three other girls feel isolated. So, I’ve pretty much decided to not have a Maid/Matron of Honor at all. Is this absolutely psycho of me? Most of them live out of the state, so am I just adding unnecessary frustration for myself or for them?
And if I do decide to skip out on choosing a Maid/Matron of Honor, how do I divvy up “responsibilities” (bridal shower, holding my bouquet, speeches, etc.)?
Post # 3
Instead of having one Maid/Matron of Honor or multiple MOHs, why not ask each girl what they would like to do. Maybe 2 girls can take the responsibility of the bachelorette party and 2 can do the shower and 1 do a speech and 1 hold your bouqet.
Post # 4
@AmyFarrahFowler:+1, I think it’s a great idea to ask them about these things!
Also, I’m “just” having two bridesmaids. Since they are both close friends, I would have felt awkward appointing one of them as the Maid/Matron of Honor. So far this has worked great, with both girls being very excited and involved.
Post # 5
I love this approach. I’ve always been uncomfortable with singling out one friend as the “best.”
As far as duties go, I actually found that there were no duties that I needed a maid of honor for. For things like the bachelorette and bridal shower, one or some of your friends will either step up and offer to host that or not…same as if you had a Maid/Matron of Honor. Little stuff during the ceremony, like holding your bouquet, will be covered by the Bridesmaid or Best Man who’s standing closest to you. This can be determined by height,if you want. There’s really noting that a Maid/Matron of Honor needs to “do,” at least not in my experience.
Post # 6
@AmyFarrahFowler: I like this idea. I know that some people have crazy anxiety about the fact that they “need” to write and give a speech… This way, the lady who wants to can. No stress. Thanks for not making me feel crazy.
@stillme: That was kind of my thought process, too. I’m sure some of them are more inclined to do the bachelorette party and can take that on if they want to. I guess it’s just in the back of my head that maybe none of them will want to do any of it :-/ I have no problem planning a kick-ass bachelorette party or shower, though, if need be… that way I know it’d be something I want to do!
Post # 7
@jwdesiree: tell them all that you love them all equally & cannot pick so there is no maid of honour….
Post # 8
usually for bridal parties people place their maids in order from favorite to um… least favorite, for lack of better words. in your case since you dont have any particular favorites, i suggest lining them up behind you from tallest to shortest, or visa versa. then, the tallest/shortest (whoever is closest to you) will hold your bouquet and fix your train on your big day. then you can split up the other duties between the other ladies… but try to kind of spread the duties out so that one person doesnt end up paying a whole bunch and the other has a free ride. i am so sorry for the poor grammar, no capitoliations, and anything else wrong in here. my phone doesnt cooperate well with weddingbee. good luck .