- 6 years ago
- Wedding: September 2012
I’m brand new to this site, but I have been browsing on here every now and then. It seems like such a great wedding resource site and the people on here always seem so supportive and encouraging.
I have never posted anything publicly before…so this is all new for me.
I’m having a terrible time with self esteem. My wedding is in 2 months and I can’t shake this “depressed” feeling about how I look and how I will look on my wedding day. I do go for counselling, but it’s such a deeply rooted issue with me that it’s causing me to have anxiety attacks.
To be honest, I keep thinking that I may just make history as the one girl who doesn’t look amazingly beautiful on her wedding day. Everyone keeps saying I’m so crazy for thinking this way, but that’s just how it feels inside – I don’t know how change this feeling and insecurity. 🙁 My wedding planner was asking why I felt so nervous about my upcoming engagement photo shoot. She said I am one of the most beautiful brides she has ever worked with and then I just started crying! Right there in Starbucks. It was horrible and I felt so embarrassed. But, obviously I have such crappy self esteem.
My mom always bugs me and says that I always think everyone is “so beautiful” – even when she doesn’t think they are. I look at women and I just see beauty in everyone and I have never, ever seen a bride not look so incredibly gorgeous on her wedding day. Yet, I keep thinking that it’s NOT going to be like that for me. It’s almost unfathomable for me to just believe that I will look beautiful.
I’m not trying to throw a pity party for myself. I’m just trying to understand why I feel this way and figure out ways I can boost my confidence and actually ENJOY my wedding day, instead of wondering if everyone is gasping at how bad I look or how fat my arms are or how I chose the wrong dress to wear. It’s not a fun life feeling like this. 🙁
Has anyone else felt this way before? I should be basking in happiness, but I’m so sick with worry and anxiety about how I look and the stress of looking “perfect” that I just can’t seem to enjoy any of this.
I attached a couple pictures of me in my dress during my first fitting. I felt so incredibly fat in it and wanted to cry.
Can you gals be honest with me and let me know if you think I look like a stuffed sausage? I am going to try to lose some weight within the little time I have left. But…I just don’t want to look like an ugly blob on my wedding day.
Please give it to me straight!
Thanks for listening, ladies. 🙂
P.S. Any tips on how to lose arm fat FAST?