Post # 1
I bought a dress from David’s Bridal in-store about a month ago (the sexier one, down below, with the low cut), but it was the 5th dress I tried on, and I was there with my mom, and made the decision a little too quickly. I never wear low cut tops, and I know it looks normal, but it just feels a little sexier than what I feel comfortable with (I know how lame that sounds, but for me, I can see myself looking down at my boobs the whole wedding to try and make sure they’re more covered and it makes me nervous!). I also feel nervous about telling my mom I think I decided too quickly and made a mistake. I paid for the dress, but I feel bad because it was a special experience we had together.
Last week I found a dress I’d had my eye on for MONTHS from BHLDN available online in my size. It’s used (which I never thought I’d go for, but I’m that obsessed with the dress). I tried it on and immediately loved it. I know it’s more conservative, but it feels much more sleek and more “me” than the first one. It’s tough because I’m looking at them, and I feel like the first one from David’s looks better from the front, but the back of it is bulky and doesn’t show off my figure because of the A-line and while the second is more conservative, I do feel like it’s very form fitting and still sexy in its own way.
I know I unfortunately can’t return to David’s since I bought in-store (ugh) so I will have to sell online. I also have to have a couple of slight repairs made to the used one I bought online, which I’m currently negotiating with the seller.
I’m a little nervous because I know we all have dress regret, but I just want to make sure people don’t think I look like a nun in the more conservative one! We are having a very small wedding, under 40 people, at a beautiful B&B. Just a ceremony and lovely dinner, no dancing, and I feel like the conservative one is easier for me to feel comfortable in, and walk around it, and just hang out, but also feels very elegant and something I’ll feel comfortable taking professional photos in.
Any advice? And any tips on selling a brand new wedding dress online – site recs, etc? Am I making a big mistake trying to take this all on?
Post # 2
Honestly from an outsider, the first one is so much better. It’s so lovely and not for one second did I think “girl, that’s one sexy dress”. It’s not sheer or high cut or super revealing. You’re not pushing boundaries, it’s just flattering.
The second BHLDN is matronly, the farthest thing from sexy, and did nothing for me.
BUT, I’d still go with what you’re comfortable in because ultimately that’s more important.
Post # 3
LobstaGurl : I had the same dress regret and also decided to purchase another dress. Sometimes your sanity is more important and if you are happier with the new dress, that’s all that matters! I personally think both look stunning on you. They are both different looks and both beautiful! I can tell you by experience that it is very difficult to sell a dress, depending on the brand and price that you are willing to let it go for. Try eBay first, then there are other sites such as preowned wedding dress.com. There’s a one time fee to post your item.
Post # 4
I much prefer the first one. I kind of cringed when I saw the second one. It looks matronly on you (imo).
You have to be willing to take a loss on the dress you’re selling, and also be patient. It can take a while. I’d start with a max selling price of 75% of the retail price on the dress and adjust from there. Make yourself available so people can try it on. Advertise on the preowned sites as well as your local FB wedding pages. Good luck!
Post # 5
i had dress regret too and couldn’t return to David’s. i ended up altering the heck out of the dress but in the end wish i had just found something more “me.” go with your gut! the “conservative” one is still flattering and romantic!
Post # 6
jellybellynelly : Thank you so much for your feedback. I do think the first one is more striking but I didn’t know if I’d feel nervous to wear it, beacuse even though it’s not like I’m the most conservative person ever, I feel like it just makes me feel very exposed showing off my boobs. I’m just a little bit nervous because, this may sound totally stupid, but I sort of felt like it made my arms look fat and my butt look bigger because of the fall of the first dress being more A-line. I also may get the train removed. I ordered one size up from the sample I tried on in the store, so when I get the actual dress from David’s, there will probably be a little more boob coverage. It’s definitely helpful to hear that other people think the first one is better… it just makes me feel like I may be going outside of my comfort zone to look better, haha.
Post # 7
I LOVE the new one! I agree with and understand what you’re saying, I dress more conservative too and I would totally make the same choice you did!
I do not think its matronly AT ALL, but that’s because its my taste. I think its still actually sexy and flattering but in a romantic way. I get that its not everyone’s taste, but I dress for my fiancé, not for anyone else. I think the person makes something look matronly, and your figure and appearance aren’t matronly.
You have to feel comfortable in it. I am very thin but have a big chest and I am always conscious of not feeling like everyone is looking at my chest
Post # 8
LobstaGurl : It doesnt look like too much boobage, but you can also work with alterations to make it a bit more conservative too. But when you said sexy, I was expecting like the pnina lingere style dresses!
And your arms and butt certainly dont look fat in it! LOL girl you are tiny.
Post # 9
pixxiefox : Thank you so much for your feedback!!! By new one do you mean the long-sleeved one from BHLDN or the spaghetti strap? I feel like I’m getting such strong feedback that the spaghetti one is better I’m second guessing the more conservative one now, which I like cause it just felt more “me”.
Post # 10
I dislike the one with the sleeves.
It looks constricting.
Post # 11
- Wedding: September 2017 - Poppy Ridge Golf Course
I agree with pp, the new one gives off a matronly vibe. However, your opinion and comfort is most important so if you feel like you’ll be self conscious in the original I wouldn’t wear it. I don’t mind pushing boundaries but my confidence level is high when I do, if I was uncomfortable that would be different. Totally relate about arms. I can’t stand the side view of mine, they aren’t fat (neither are yours btw) and I know this but they still look large to me from the side. 😤
Post # 12
I actually updated my post with even more love for the new one. I hate the spaghetti strap one. I love the long sleeve. I get that 99.9% of dresses look like the spaghetti strap one, and most brides want a sexier dress, but I don’t think you need to show skin to be sexy. I could post a pic of me in a high neck long sleeve dress and I doubt anyone in the world would think it looked matronly, its about the person wearing it. I think the long sleeve is sexy and elegant. But it doesn’t matter what I think or what anyone here thinks, only what you think, and what you feel comfortable in. If you’re uncomfortable in the spaghetti dress it will show in your body language and all your pictures, so wear what YOU feel comfortable and beautiful in.
Post # 13
I love the second one. Normally I don’t go for that high of a neck, but you pull it off.
Post # 14
I adore the second. I’ve always preferred wedding dresses with sleeves and mine had them. I disagree with many PP stating that is looks matronly. It still is tighter fitting and if you got it altered to fit even more I don’t see how anyone could call it matronly. Regardless, you should choose what you want and what you feel is more you. I honestly think the David’s dress looks similar to what many many people wear, and the second is more unique and different. But we all have different styles. And honestly, by the sound of your wedding I feel like the second one would just “go” more. When is your wedding?
Post # 15
LobstaGurl : I see what you mean about the boobage on number one, but you could easily have a nude mesh/sheer panel put in and it wouldn’t feel that way anymore.
number 2 is more matronly than conservative imo. It’s body skimming, and shows off your figure, but overall the vibe is a bit matronly whereas number one with a nude mesh is graceful, bridal, elegant, and feminine. Plus you got it with your mom, and to me that’s a big deal.