Post # 1
Got a problem here, not the bride, but a newly minted maid of honor. The lovely bride to be and my best friend of 27 years was proposed to on her birthday only three days ago! Her fiancé and I are very old friends, and since we’ve known each other so long, he asked for my help in picking up and delivering the ring to the family dinner where he proposed. All of that went perfectly and she was elated! After dinner we told her all that we were up to in order to make sure everything went perfectly and she was so touched….the whole time though, her older sister looked angered by the entire thing, I thought maybe she was just tired and focused on my friend. The next morning the bride to be calls and asks if I will be her maid of honor, sharing the position with her older sister, I accepted. She called her sister, who lives an hour and a half away and she refused. Told the bride that she can only have one maid of honor, that she hates the idea of me being involved and then proceeded to call the parents to complain. The bride phoned me so very upset and in tears, after hearing what happend I offered immediately to step down to a bridesmaid or out of the party completely to avoid any additional drama, but she insists that she wants to have us both and I feel terribly about all of it. I know I’m not family, but this woman and I have been there for each other througout our lives, we grew up I each other’s families, and I can’t imagine my without her. Her sister is 12 years older and not someone I very well well at all.
Is there anything I can do to ease this problem? Suggestions would be greatly appreciated, I love the bride like a sister and would do anything to make sure she enjoys every part of her engagement and wedding.
Post # 3
@Nona99: I think you did the right thing by offering to be just a bridesmaid or not in the bridal party if that would cause less drama. But the bride refused and so I think the only thing you can do is be the best Maid/Matron of Honor you can.
Post # 4
@Nona99: I don’t think there is much else you can do! You have offered to step down already (very gracious of you, in my opinion). Just be there for your friend. Support her decisions, listen to her, and do what you feel is right to make it a good celebration for her.
Post # 5
Hmm.. this is tough! But I think her sister is being a BRAT! Its your friends wedding and you should do whatever she says or insists. She obviously wants you to be a Maid/Matron of Honor so I would just be supportive with her and just roll with it … Maybe trying to call her sister and work things out would be beneficial and squash the drama immediatly so this wedding process is fun for everyone! Just be a good friend, like you seem you are already being! Goodluck and don’t get sucked into the drama of her sister!!!
Post # 6
I think the thing for you to do is nothing. This is a problem between the bride and her sister.
You have already been very gracious in offering to step down to a Bridesmaid or Best Man role, or out of the bridal party altogether. You have done what you can do.
Her ingrate sister is being incredibly self-centred and childish.
Is there any chance the older sister is married? If so, she would be a matron of honor and you would be the maid of honor.
Post # 7
Her sister and I are both married, the bride to be was maid of honor in both of our weddings. She’s been very vocal about having two maids of honor, and frankly I am puzzled by her sister’s resistance to the arrangement.