- The Pumpkin Queen
- 7 years ago
- Wedding: October 2012
So appointing a maid of honor position to someone is a big deal. I should have taken way more time then what i did selecting who I did because she is nothing but a flake. I have been friends with her for over 3 years now and we work together. Quite honestly I really don’t know what I was thinking. This girl is mentally unstable and can snap at you for absolutely no reason if she is stressing about something. We had a falling out prior to my engagement and picked up our friendship again after I got engaged. She is not married, single and went through a bad breakup on and off for the last three years. I consoled her every step of the way during her breakup. I have driven her many times over and over again to get her car serviced. Anything on my desk is fair game to her takes what she wants and never bothers to replace it. Lashing out on me about something she needs to do for work and yells at me to help her do it. I have given her numerous items from my home we no longer wanted. And when she stated how if something were to ever happen were she needed someones help she had no one to help her. Which I simply replied you can always call me.I am the type of person who will give you the shirt off my back and I expect my friends to do the same. There have been numerous times now that I have suspected a hint of jealousy. Comments like “I wish I had your life” or “you don’t know how easy you have it”. Also when I was recommended for a promotion within my company she came out with “well I am going for that posistion too then”. Instead of being happy for a friend she insist on being snarky about things.
Recently her sister was diagnoised with cancer and she has been coming in later some days to take her to appointments. So she has to make up hours most days which she will leave at 6pm opposed to her normal time which is 4:30. She is also one of 10 siblings and has mentioned to me numerous times that she doesn’t like her family. Regardless of her feelings she is still helping out her sister.
I recently acquired a second job and the conflicted a bit with my hours at my regular job. I was told by my manager I needed someone to cover for me. I left her office that day and explained the situation to my friend whom works an earlier shift. She completely flipped out and started yelling about how she couldn’t do it. (Also just a side note we were emailed asking to volunteer to work later a while back and she said screw this I refuse to work later). I wasn’t asking her I was just explaining what I needed to do. I asked serval others and no one could do it. I then had to go back to my manager and ask to figure this out for me if she could. This was over the course of two days she had looked into it for me. During that time I really didn’t want to talk with anyone especially someone who is on edge all day. So i kept to myself. Toward the end of the day I was approached and attacked by her once again explaining it’s so unfair of me to ask. When may I remind you I never did. Instead of attacking her back I said I did not want to be bothered and I was dealing with enough not to have someone attack me.
We are now closing an end. The next day i decided I don’t need a friend like this. I relationship is only one sided. When she needs something it doesn’t matter if I have to go out of my way I still do it. When I need a favor like when I had no car for a week and needed a ride to and from work her answer to me is that’s out of my way. Find someone else to help you. So I emailed her stating exactly how I feel about our friendship in a very diplomatic way. My reply back was “Thanks for being a “real” friend”. So I replied back to her response saying it’s obvious you don’t know what a real friend is. And that is that. How many of you would feel that you were taken advantage of and used all this time? Because that is exactly how I feel. I was not trying to be insensitive to what was going on in her life and never once asked for her help. If the roles were reversed no matter what is going on in my life I would help out my friends no matter what.