(Closed) Major bridesmaid dilemma

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: Should I make a friend (who I'm not very close with) my bridesmaid since I was her MOH?
    Yes! She should be a bridesmaid at least. : (2 votes)
    5 %
    No! There is no need to include her. : (41 votes)
    95 %
  • Post # 3
    Hostess
    2999 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    I would say no, it was years ago, people change and drift apart.  It’s just one of those things!

    Post # 4
    Member
    701 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: January 2013

    I would definitely not include her just because you were her Maid/Matron of Honor. You want to look back at your wedding pictures and smile not regret including a Bridesmaid or Best Man who you wouldn’t even want as a friend.

    Post # 5
    Member
    6830 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    Yep I was a Bridesmaid or Best Man in a friends wedding, when my time came. We were not close anymore so I asked her to be a personal attendant, she said yes but then backed out because she felt that because we had been friends “longer” than one of my other BM’s she didn’t want to be in my wedding. Honestly our friendship was on a downward sprial as it was.  I honestly didn’t want her “drama” involved in my wedding so it worked out well. Granted we don’t talk anymore but I am okay with that

    Post # 6
    Member
    350 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    you want your best girls by your side, and she doesn’t sound like one of those girls. You’ll probably regret having her in the wedding later. I’d say no!

    Post # 7
    Member
    4945 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    It’s not tit-for-tat. Just because someone was in a bridal party doesn’t mean they have to include that person once their wedding rolls around. Ask people who you want to be in your party because you are close with them, not to “return the favor.”

    Post # 9
    Member
    350 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    @sdnathe:  There were girls I have been friends with longer that I didn’t have in my wedding, I wanted the girls that were by my side to be the girls that I’m not only close to NOW but that have been a part of my relationship with my fi and know us as a couple (and grew with us as a couple) so my childhood best friend was not included even though I will always consider her my friend.

    Post # 10
    Member
    1729 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    @sdnathe:  I’ve had a similar situation recently. I was my friend from elementary and hs’s Maid/Matron of Honor over 7 years ago. I’ve since moved away and we really don’t have much in common any more. She is not in my wedding party, and I’d be willing to be that she’s relieved about it. She can still participate in showers and parties, of course.

    Post # 11
    Member
    45 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    I have a lot of long term friends, but my fiance and I decided to ask people to be in our wedding party that were supportive and important to us both.  It is our day together and we wanted people that we both know very well.  I wouldn’t feel right having someone beside me that my fiance didn’t know very well and vice versa.  

    Post # 13
    Member
    1044 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    @sdnathe: I hate this part of wedding planning! Dont include anyone out of guilt… If I did that, I’d have 80 attendants and no guests! 

    one of my friends got married in 2011 and I was not in her party. We had been fairly close once and I introduced her to her bestie/MOH.

    To include me, she asked me to join her and her girls while they got ready… I was so excited At first but then felt a little left out bcs I was just sitting there! I didn’t hold it against her though, I found it thoughtful of her to make an effort. 

     

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