- 2 years ago
- Wedding: April 2017
This isn’t exactly wedding related but I suppose it can be as we have all (or will) try to plan the perfect menu, whether it be for a wedding or a dinner party.
This happened this past weekend (Father’s Day). My sister and her husband were hosting dinner and having my parents, siblings and BIL’s parents and siblings over. Her husband’s sister, I’ll call her “Sarah”, has been a vegetarian for several years, not for health reasons (like allergies), and is very outspoken on her choices. Every time my sister and Brother-In-Law host, they have gone out of their way to accommodate for her tastes.
My sister works so she had her menu planned out days before and had everything bought with the intention on making the food Saturday. Friday night, her husband talked to Sarah to find out what time they were coming (as she said they would be late) and she said, by the way, we are all vegan now. Her kids were never even vegetarian before, now they only eat vegan. My Brother-In-Law said it would have been nice if she had let them know sooner, as his wife had everything planned out and already bought the food.
My sister panicked as her meals were vegetarian friendly but not vegan. My Brother-In-Law saw how upset she was and said they’ve already gone out of their way to give them vegetarians meals, that his sister could eat what they offered for one meal. Saturday morning, while my Brother-In-Law was at work, my sister spent the morning googling vegan recipies and finally asked if I knew anyone vegan that could help her. I texted one of DH’s friend’s wife (she’s vegetarian and sometimes eats vegan) and she gave me some ideas. My sister ran out and bought the new ingredients needed and made the vegan entrees. Her husband was pissed when he got home that she went through all the extra trouble.
The next day, Sarah and her kids came and didn’t thank my sister for changing her menu for them. My Brother-In-Law said something to Sarah, that his wife went though all the extra trouble and she didn’t seem appreciative. This turned into world war 3 with his parents, who basically said as hosts, it was up to Brother-In-Law and my sister to go that extra mile to make sure their guests had something they could eat. Sarah of course agreed, then threw out there that everything was nut free, to which my sister replied that it’s because I had an anaphylactic reaction to tree nuts one, and that choosing to have dietary restrictions is completely diifferent than being allergic to something.
So now it’s several days later and it’s still going back and forth between my sister, her husband and the in laws.
My question is (sorry so long), as a host, are you required to accommodate your guests’ dietary restrictions/choices OR is it a “it would be nice” thing? I’ve seen several threads about Bees only offering vegetarian or vegan food for their reception and it seems like those threads are always hotly debated. Curious as to whether the same responses would apply to a dinner party one is hosting.
Thanks in advance for your thoughts.