Making friends at work & keeping friendships alive as an adult

posted 9 months ago in The Lounge
Post # 18
Member
38 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2020

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glutton :  I don’t mean anything specific more so habits they themselves like the least about themselves, like procrastinating or doing the bare minimum at things in life or not being accountable for their behaviour.  I realised I like to put my best foot forward when making friends but sometimes it can be perceived as being unrelatable because you’ve come off as although you’re a goody two shoes or perfectionist. 

I didn’t let that change me as a person wholly, I did change my approach though by listening more than talking and asking questions about the other person and letting them talk about themselves so I can learn what they like and see if we’re compatible. Being friends with ladies who are more mature meant not running into certain issues like competition or comparison, because we’re different in our life phases, my friends are able to advise me and wish me well because in a way they see me as their younger sister, which I’m very okay with. And I’m grateful for their wisdom and experience as well.  It’s fun because we still meet at the same level in terms of hobbies and values. Just wanted to shed more light on that but but yeah I was a massive loner in high school dispute being popular (I did drama and music so I was always on stage) I had no real friends.

Post # 19
Member
135 posts
Blushing bee

Im in the same boat and have been ever since I graduated high school. I would make friends in college, but they would always dissapear and not being interested by the next semester. And I am feeling it even more now that I am graduated and in the real world. Well sort of. I was supposed to start my new job in my new city but my start date got delayed because of everything going on. I got to explore my new city for a couple days before lock down started. So i totally feel you with not having any real friends.

Post # 22
Member
1344 posts
Bumble bee

The only thing I can suggest is that if people feel that you are uncomfortable then it can be contagious. I seem to make girlfriends fairly easily but I also put myself out there! I work with predominantly men so I find other women and  I ask colleagues to lunch, ask them about their lives, comment on their social media pics and show am interest…like it’s hard but you have to put yourself out there and not be afraid of rejection. And you will get rejected! It’s kind of like the dating world. But you will find your people. It’s hard with COVID at the moment but are there any Facebook groups in your area you could join? My brother is painfully shy (not saying you are) but I’ve had convos with him like this before. xo

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