Man needs help with Moissanite decision

posted 2 years ago in Engagement
Post # 16
9695 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2014 - Chicago, IL

Brian2 :  You don’t have to get her a flawless 2 ct diamond. There are lab diamonds on that might be a nice balance between getting her a diamond and saving some money. But if she wants a diamond, no stimulant will suffice. Period. You have one shot to get this right. Don’t ruin it by getting her a moissanite if she’s not 100% on board with it or won’t be proud to show it off.

Post # 17
208 posts
Helper bee

DrAtkins :  This

Diamond and Moissanite sparkle very differently, especially when you get into larger ct sizes. Lab diamonds are an awesome choice to get more bang for your buck in an ethical way. 

Post # 18
656 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2018

 I’d talk to her about it first. Moissanite doesn’t fade or stop sparkling like a czr would. The oil slick oxidation is basically a non issue since its easily buffed out with a cloth at home and super rare. There are certain people who are hardcore about you needing to get a diamond, you’ll find them on every moissanite thread, the same ones saying the same things. It’s perfectly reasonable not to want to spend that much on something with no intrensic and hardly any resale value. Some girls have diamond in their head and nothing else will do no matter how much it might make sense. If she has it in her head she won’t be happy with a moissanite or anything that doesn’t come with that gia cert. However moissanite is an awesome option if you want a nice size clear sparkler that will last your lifetime. I chose moissanite as have many others on this site and I don’t see a lot of regret about it. I won’t “upgrade” to a diamond even if we’re billionaires because frankly to me a moissanite is a superior stone and there’s no nuance that a stone could have that would be worth tens of thousands of dollars for something with a purely asthetic function to feel like it’s better. 

Post # 19
3010 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2008

Lab-created diamonds, vintage/antique diamonds or pawn shop diamonds can save you a lot of money! She might also be okay with white sapphires or even colored gemstones (blue sapphires are pretty popular right now thanks to Princess Kate/Princess Di’s ring). 

I would ask her feelings about stimulants and non diamond rings before purchasing anything though!

Post # 20
8584 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Brian2 :  

Yes, do make absolutely sure she is ok with a diamond stimulant before going too far into the process. Many women are, quite reasonably. Many are not and l for one would 100% rather have a coloured natural  gemstone . Or maybe she would like a lab  diamond ?

Post # 21
204 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2018

I have a lab diamond ring that I absolutely love and it was reasonably priced (2-3k). My fiancé and I talked about it before hand and agreed so we made that decision together and I wasn’t disappointed by getting something I wasn’t expecting. He got it from brilliant earth and I know they do moissanite as well and have many options when selecting a ring. 

Post # 22
936 posts
Busy bee

Brian2 :  Your financial responsibilty is a wonderful quality. Don’t ever change. I have a half ct diamond and know nothing about moissy. Sorry.

Post # 23
974 posts
Busy bee

Brian2 :  I am sure she would not expect you to get a FL 2 carat diamond.

I have a higher quality diamond for my engagement ring. 1.21, VVS1, F. But my right hand ring is .75, D and has some inclusions.

If she wants a moissy then by all means go that route. But if she is a diamond girl. Find one that works with your budget.

You have me curious… Are you a day trader? How do you make your income with stocks?

Post # 24
2517 posts
Sugar bee

Between a large moissanite and a small diamond or other natural gemstone, many women would pick one of the latter options. Myself included. I just hate the idea of created stones. The fact that natural gems have been formed over millions of years in the earth is what makes them so amazing to me, so it’s not just a matter of whether it looks the same (which, as others will tell you, they don’t to the trained eye). You should definitely make sure she is okay with a simulant before purchasing. Before Fiance and I decided on using an heirloom, our budget was similar to yours. In that price range I would have gone for a sapphire or a vintage diamond ring. 

Post # 25
250 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

Brian2 :  I would shop around first and see what your options are , I would perfer a diamond over mossys because they tend to stain and a mossy and a diamond look completely different in person because mossys have a disco ball affect.. I am not bashing mossys everyone has their own prefrences and you should really talk to your gf about this before comitting to a purchase. I hope you figure it out! and congrats on taking the next step! 

Post # 27
1743 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2018

Brian2 :  You may need to have it custom made. There are custom jewellers that will let you use your own stone if you find one you like. That’s what we did for my wedding band and was only $300 with tax for my fairly simple 5 stone ring from a local jeweler.

So you talked to her about her thoughts on rings.  If you do get it custom designed,  does she want to be a part of that? I have a sister who designed her own ring and another that picked hers out from the jeweler and both were really happy with sharing the process with their future husbands.  I ended up telling fi the sort of ring i wanted,  but left the actual ring selection up to him and he picked the perfect one for me.  

And for fun,  I’ll share a pic of my vintage sapphire engagement ring beside my custom wedding band. It’s not a perfect combo,  but I love it. 

Post # 28
1243 posts
Bumble bee

Brian2 :  So she’s completely onboard with a lab grown stone or diamond alternative? 

Does she want a big stone (diamond in particular) or would she be happy with a smaller real diamond within the budget?

I couldn’t justify the inflated cost of diamonds, also didn’t really want to buy online, and also didn’t want a stone that looks pretty much like diamonds (that’s just me though because I know I will hate people mistaking it as a diamond and having to explain it is not). So… I decided on something completely different that I really liked, which is a morganite (pink stone). 

Anyway I think sapphire is a great idea. Or a smaller high quality diamond if that’s what she wants.

Post # 29
446 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2019 - Canadian Rockies

Brian2 :  I think the lab diamond halo is what makes your search difficult. I haven’t seen many lab diamond halos in my searches, but then again I wasn’t picky on that part. A lot of lab gemstones seem to be surrounded by white lab sapphires or real diamonds. Here are a few I found on Zales:




Here is my ring. Lab sapphire, lab white sapphire halo, and tiny diamonds on the sides. White gold, 9 mm. I went with lab because of the reasons you mentioned. Color, clarity, same composition as natural stone, and I wanted something on the larger side. It’s also my birthstone, and I don’t like that diamonds are so overpriced.

Post # 30
113 posts
Blushing bee

I have 2 mossianite rings, both have never had a issue with “oxidation”.  I wear both 24/7, one I’ve worn daily since 2008 (from mossianiteco) and the other I’ve worn 24/7 since 2016.  (from Charles & Colvard)  Both of my rings are just as beautiful as the day I received them.

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