(Closed) Manager of less than 1 year – to invite, or not?

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
1868 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

If you’re not close, then no. I will be inviting ONE person to my wedding who I currently work with. I will be inviting 4 others who I used to work with, but have become friends with since they left. Everyone else at work doesn’t get an invite just cause I work with them. It’s not like I choose to see them everday. But I can choose to invite them to my wedding or not. 

Post # 4
Member
378 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Do you think your new manager would be offended if you didn’t invite him? Or do you think he would feel relieved to be left off the guest list?

I did invite my new manager when I sent out invitations (he started about five months before the wedding) out of etiquette. I work very closely with the new manager, and it would have been weird not to invite him when I was inviting pretty much the rest of my team. Plus, I like him, so there’s that too. If you like your new manager, and don’t want to worry about offending him, I would extend an invitation. If he doesn’t want to come, he’ll find an excuse.

Post # 5
Member
1375 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I didn’ta invite any work colleagues for this reason, so cant give you my example. However, if you are inviting 4 + people from work already, if he knows and it is a smaller group,or office, I can see that he might get offended, and possibly hold it against you when promotions or recommendations are concerned.

Post # 6
Member
1699 posts
Bumble bee

@blinx:  It is bad social form advance your career by means of your social events. It is unprofessional to let your personal doings interfere with your work. Work life and personal life are separate domains that should be kept separate, and learning to establish appropriate boundaries between them will in the long run pay off in both domains.

That does not mean that you cannot make friends at work. You are spending forty hours a week or so with your colleagues. It would be sad indeed if you didn’t find any friends among them. But “friends” are people that you think of as, well, “friends”. If the first thing that comes to mind when you answer the question “Who is Mr Pointy-hair?” is “He’s my boss” or “He’s my colleague”, then you don’t think of him as a friend. It would be improper to invite him to a social event. If the answer that comes to mind is “He is a friend whom I met at work when I got transferred into his department,” then yes, you may with propriety invite him.

Post # 7
Member
715 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012 - W Hotel Silicon Valley

I’ve been at my job for almost 7 years and I only invited ONE person from work.  We are the closest and Darling Husband and I actually hang out with him and his wife outside of work every once in awhile.  Nobody else was offended–or at least they didn’t say anything or show it.  Everyone was excited to see photos!  Invite who you want 🙂

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