(Closed) Managing wedding anxiety?

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
533 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I’m getting married on a Sunday in June too 🙂

Aw, first, take a deep, deep breath. Things are going to work out. You are going to have a beautiful wedding. Unfortunately, some things are out of our control- like the major sporting event being scheduled the weekend of your wedding, or not being able to have a rehearsal on the day before. (We may not either!)

My suggestion: make a list of things you CAN work on to change these anxieties. Contact other hotels about blocks. If you aren’t sending out invitations for a bit, maybe send an email to relatives as a sort of Save the Date.

On the bridesmaid dress front, I highly recommend writing a seperate topic on here- I am sure someone can help you. I am curious; what color do you want? I was dead set on having mine wear mint green dresses. It was impossible to find, so to make it easier, I just went with teal dresses.

You’re not alone! Wedding planning is stressful, and when it rains, it pours.

Post # 4
1177 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

There’s no rule saying you can’t do the rehearsal on Friday, or even Thursday. Even if some of the wedding party can’t make it, at least you and the other major players can block it out, and then maybe write notes for the others and walk through them at the rehearsal dinner.  

StDs aren’t necessary by any means, but if lots of people are from out of town, it might be a good idea to email them (and call anyone who doesn’t have email) in advance of the invitations. It’s not too late to do that now.


Post # 5
11747 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@SuspiciousCoconut:  Can you have your rehearsal the morning of? That’s what we’re doing since there’s a wedding the night before our wedding.

You can’t control sporting events, etc. so stop worrying about the things you can’t control – it’s just counter productive and not worth the stress.

I’d let up on your “vision” for the Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses and just pick something sooner rather than later. It took me forever to find what I envisioned and I never actually found that – I Just had to give up the vision because after months and months of searching, clearly what I wanted didn’t exist.


Post # 6
484 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

@SuspiciousCoconut:  Everything you said sounds almost exactly what I experienced…. Difficulty with getting a hotel block because though our wedding is a Sunday, hotels were still completely full and blocked in our area because of all the Saturday weddings, we are also having our wedding in a destination/vacation area and the only hotel I could eventually find gave us rooms that were so expensive, I felt guilty offering them to our out of town guests. Many of our guests are just getting cheaper hotels that are farther away. That sucks, but at least they’re still coming. 

I also picked a bridesmaids color that was so weird I couldn’t find it anywhere…. And when we did eventually find a dress and order it, the color isn’t really what I expected it to be and I think they dresses are kind of ugly, but it was too late to do anything about that, so I’m just having to deal. Based on this, I’d say that as much as I loved having a unique color, it’s really easier overall if you just go with a more common one. I really wish I had. 

And my officiant, who is a friend of my Mom’s who normally books like 4 weddings a year managed to take a random wedding for the day before ours, so now we have to have a rehearsal in the morning, and I’m not sure if we’re going to be allowed in our venue to do it or not. Plus I hate being the wedding that comes second, I’ll worry that the two ceremonies will get confused…. Probably won’t happen but still obnoxious. 

So I guess I have to say, what you’re experiencing is totally normal.  NOTHING goes 100% to plan. I know this is cliche advice, but what more can you do than focus on the positives… You’re marrying the man you want to spend the rest of your life with. At the end of the day, how much does it matter if the dresses weren’t exactly the right color? At least you had great friends and family wearing them. This is what I’m telling myself, because I too have a huge tendency to overstress. Now I’m having nightmares like every night. But I’m trying to stay focused on what’s really important, and that’s that in one month, I’m going to be officially married to the man I love. 

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