- Mr. Coffee
- 8 years ago
- Wedding: November 2011
A member suggested that I make post on the waiting board; regarding, of course… waiting for the proposal/enagement actually taking place.
Here’s is what I told a fellow female member who was struggling with the waiting process:
Guys Point of View – I’ve noticed a lot of ladies discussing this issue. Waiting too long for the ring/engagement. The man simply not coming through on an original expected timeline. In some cases, worrying if it’s going to happen at all!
I live my life around one rule… and I think it’s pretty simple:
“A Happy Miss Coffee is A Happy Mr Coffee”
When it came to getting the ring; I wanted her to a be apart of the pre-stages, going to the stores and letting me know what she liked (SEE MY 1 RULE) . So right there… IT’S ON! Miss Coffee walked away (no doubt called all her girlfriends) shouting “he’s buying me a ring… I’m going to be engaged”.
When it comes to the ring; there are two kinds of guys: 1. Those who involve thier girlfriends and 2. Those who keep it a complete surprise. It really is a double edge sword in the sense that there are pros and cons to each one.
The only problem I noticed with involving Miss Coffee in the ring process, was that she instantly placed me on a timetable. Now of course, she didn’t come right out and say “ok… you have 3 weeks and you better put a ring on it”! However, and she would agree with this… Miss Coffee mentally placed my on a timetable.
Guys are not stupid…. ok, ok… we are! But most men know that moment we start looking at rings/venues/churches… its go time. It’s also true that some guys place the cart before the horse and give his girlfriend the worng impression on when said engagement is going to take place. However, if every guy follows the only rule I live by (see rule 1)… then everything will work out. I will say that I’m rather confused on how many ladies have said they have looked at & even gone as far as booking halls before actually being engaged. Speaking as a guy, that seems very strange.
I will say this – For some guys, it’s not just as simple as buying and ring and popping the question. For me, I wanted to create an entire “proposal day” for Miss Coffee. I wanted to give her a VERY special day.
Do you know how long it took me to plan, prepare, and organize Miss Coffee’s proposal day??? Over 3 months! I also wanted to speak to her grandfather and ask for his blessing before moving forward. There are many aspects that I think ‘some’ women don’t think about when it comes to the proposal. In the end… no matter how long you have stress or worried about it; the moment he places the ring on your finger… that all melts away. At lease it did for Miss Coffee 🙂
Basically I’m saying “don’t worry”… it will come. I’m sure your guy is also stressed, frustrated, or nervous about your proposal day. At the same time, we also want it to be somewhat of secret. You may know he’s going to do it… but we don’t want you to know what, when where, and how!
Here is another way of looking at it: Everything in life comes in stages; for the most part, its a process. Dating is process, being in a relationship is a process, buying a ring and setting up the proposal is a process, being engaged is process, planning a wedding, getting married, being married, having kids, rasing kids, and so on and so on. My point is… there is NO set timetable.
I know people who went on 2 dates; became BF/GF after a week, and got married 2 months later. At the same time, I know people who dated for months before deciding to become exclusive BF/GF, and spent 7 years in a relationship before getting engaged… then had a 2 year engagement!
There is NO set timetable. At the end of the day, it comes down to TODAY! Are you happy, does he love you with all of his heart, do you want to spend the rest of your life with him, and would wait for him?
If you can answer yes to those questions… then you’ll be just fine.
Love is always patient