Post # 152
Priscilla Zuckerberg’s ring is actually really pretty and I’m sure if she wanted something else she’d have it by now.
@ThingsThatShine: And really what you do and what your opinions are don’t really affect how I live my life. But I am quite shocked at reading what you think. I earn quite a bit more money than my Fiance, does that make me less of a woman and my Fiance less of a man?
Post # 154
@ThingsThatShine: I wasn’t trying to be snarky or mean. I’m genuinely concerned for you. I’m concerned for anyone whose entire self worth is based on something or someone outside of themselves (their kids, husband, wife, whatever). I think lahaina22
made and excellent point about a women in an abusive situation or a who is left by her husband. Where is the woman’s self worth then? I am in NO WAY against stay at home moms. My best friend knows she wants to be a Stay-At-Home Mom and I want the option. And yes, your mother’s absence did have a seriously effect on you if that’s truly why you think the way you do. I’m sure there were other factors that solidified this way of thinking (possibly lack of a strong female role model, not a good enough support system, etc). It seems to me that it was a defining moment for you and has greatly effected your view of women and their place in this world. Nobody is born thinking the way you do (or the way any of us think), they learn to think that way.
Post # 155
@Futuremrsgah: I’m not trying to do anything to you. My views don’t affect you. I don’t think women are inferior, I just prefer to see them stick to traditional gender roles.
It’s fine that there’s a choice, I just don’t like it when a woman chooses the things I prefer she wouldn’t choose lol. My likes and dislikes have no effect on anyone.
I know these things happen and I think women should have back-up plans and have some education.
I do think she’d look better if her hair were longer.
It’s not my vision of the ideal situation, but you do what you gotta/wanna do!
You don’t have to worry about me, really. I have self-worth. If I get to live my dream of being a stay at home wife/mother, I’ll have plenty to be proud of. I really love my “behind the scenes” accomplishments (for example, I dictate where all of my fiance’s money goes (he asked me to do this) and as a result, our savings is growing and his student loans are being paid off). I choose to put my self worth in domestic and emotional achievements, not career achievements.
Also, my mom was around (she works part-time)…I just wish she had been a stay-at-home mom. You’re making it sound like she was completely absent, and that wasn’t the case at all.
Post # 156
@ThingsThatShine: Can I ask if you vote according to these beliefs? Will you raise your children to expect women to act this way? If so, it does affect me. If you’re having boy children who don’t expect their wives to work or have short hair or play sports, it’s just further setting everyone back.
Post # 158
@bookworm88: I am a diehard liberal, so my voting will only benefit you.
My kids will believe whatever they want to believe. They’ll probably know how mommy feels when it comes to this stuff, but that doesn’t mean they have to believe it.
My parents think most of my thoughts on this stuff are weird, so it’s not like I started feeling this way because they hammered the thoughts into me. I wish my mom had been home all the time, I find long hair to be prettier, I hate sports in general (I wouldn’t want any boys I may have doing sports either), the military and law enforcement seem too rough (though again, I wouldn’t want any boys I may have to go into those careers, either), and every woman I know has changed her last name. It’s all based on what I’ve seen and how I feel, not what I’ve been told.
Post # 159
I think the ruby ring looks lovely, from what I can see of it! I strongly considered hinting that I wanted a ruby ring for my e-ring, myself, so I totally get her choice.
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Post # 160
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Post # 161
@ThingsThatShine: I’m curious, are you going to allow your children to participate in sports if they want to? Sports are healthy activity for children. Will you kick a soccer ball around with them at the park or play badminton with them in the backyard? Or will it be all posture and tea parties indoors when they’re at home?
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Post # 162
@starbright333: I hate Santorum with a fiery passion.
I have concerns about injuries in organized sports, so I likely won’t allow my future kids to participate in them. Casually kicking a ball around in the backyard or messing with a wiffle ball set is fine by me. My fiance and I both come from long lines of sports-hating people, so we’re hoping our kids will carry on the tradition lol.
I do need a couch, and a time machine would be nifty!
Post # 163
@ThingsThatShine: but what if your kids want to play sports? Neither DH or I played, and we’d love for our kids to love music the way we did, but I have a feeling at least one will be a sports lover. So you would not let your kids follow their own hobbies and passions based on your own desires?
Post # 164
@ThingsThatShine: ” I just feel that women belong in the home (when financially possible). I’ve just always felt that way. No real reason. “
No real reason? To make such a strong statement where you believe women belong? Maybe you should really think it through if you want to believe something so offensive, it warrants thought.
Thats like somebody saying ” I believe ______ (blacks, gays, jews, red heads etc.. ) are lesser people….. sorry thats just my opinion, no real reason”
It’s one thing to say that you believe you would be happy at home. Thats absolutely fine. Being a Stay-At-Home Wife is absolutely a job…. but it should be a choice.
Just do not tell ME where you think I belong.
Your views don’t just effect you. When you share them it effects others. They will effect your children, the girls being very limited by your views, and the boys raised to view women as lesser human beings.
Post # 165
@hisgoosiegirl: Based on my concerns rearding injuries, I would not allow it.
I’m not telling you what to do. It’s still your choice. I just prefer for women to stay home. It has nothing to do with me thinking women are lesser people. I think women *can* do anything, I just prefer when they focus their efforts on domestic things.
Any boys I may have will not view women as lesser human beings. If anything, they may end up seeing women as superior since I run the show in my relationship. Or they’ll see it as equal/teamwork, since I make the decisions and my fiance acts on them.
Post # 166
@hisgoosiegirl: Agreed. I think it does kids a serious disservice to limit a child’s activities based on ones own preferences. I can honestly say I sustained more injuries as a child falling down the stairs, leaning too far back in my chair, and tripping over random objects than I ever did in organized sports.