(Closed) Marriage Counseling

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
598 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I hope someone answers this one….I start marriage counseling with my preacher soon too and I too am a little nervous….I’ve been told you talk about things like budgeting, finances, conflict resoultion and things like that…We have to go once a week for 6 weeks…really don’t know that there is that much to discuss…lol…but i guess we will see 😀

Post # 4
Member
352 posts
Helper bee

I did a private marriage prep course and we did the following:

  • Discussed marriage as a sacrament, the Catholic view of sexuality and family planning, and the spirituality of marriage
  • Understanding the “Four stages of Marriage” (romance, disillusionment, misery, and true low), so we have a realist view of marriage and are prepared for problems
  • Practiced the “Couple Communication Method” at home and in front of the facilitator
  • Learned our Myers Briggs personality types and how this might affect our relationship
  • We also completed an 80 page marriage prep booklet that asked us about finances/budgeting, how we are going to divide up role/responsibilities in the home, what our expectations are of eachother and ourselves. Most of the booklet asked question about about ourselves and then asked how our fiance would respond and then we compared and discussed the answers afterwards (everything from our likes and dislikes, insecurities, family life growing up, what the future looks like in 1,2,5,10,25 years, our views on sexuality, spirituality, catholicism).

Our marriage prep was a private meeting with a Spiritual Director that also facilitates marriage prep for the Catholic Church. It was 3 1 hour sessions (which did not include completing the workbook).

The best part of the marriage prep to me was completing the workbook and learning our personality types through the Myers Briggs Personality questionnaires.

 

Post # 6
Member
2442 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

We did premarital couseling with a pastor.  The topics covered are children, finances, chores, goals, habits, expectations, retirement, hobbies/interests etc.  They discuss what each person wants/expects and also discusses what the Bible says about these topics within a marriage.  It really gets a couple talking in great detail about expectations on different topics and that is good because many couples find out they aren’t on the same page after the marriage instead of before the marriage.

Post # 7
Member
487 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Do you know if a pastor will do counseling with a couple if they are not marrying them in their church?

Post # 9
Member
5655 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2011

We did premarital counseling with our Pastor and Darling Husband and I BOTH got a copy of “Preparing for Marriage”, our pastor got the Pastoral guide and we followed that for 8 weeks!

It was SOOOOOOOOO great and the 2 worksheets in the beginning ar SO important in my opinion.

1. Personal History – So you know WHY your spouse reacts/does things like they do.

2. Great Expectations – a looooong worksheet covering everything from finances (how much will we spend on bday/wedding gifts for each other, children, siblings, etc), Holidays, chagning careers/going to school, sex, EVERYTHING!

I am SO glad we went through it and had some structure b/c I’ve heard so much couples going in and hearing alot of “you guys already know this” but not being given a whole lot of tools/direction.

You can get the book/kindle addition on amazon! Your copy Leaders guide

Post # 10
Member
5655 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2011

@ananeele: Some pastors will! Best just to ask….. many churches (atleast like the one I attend) has a whole ministry for counseling those that just happen to call them with need. So I would get with the pastoral care pastor of a church and ask them about it =)

Post # 12
Member
487 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Thanks!  I’m going to check that out.  The paid counseling is starting at $500.  My only concern is that the SO is adamently against going into a church.

Post # 14
Member
352 posts
Helper bee

The private marriage prep I did was held in the directors home. I liked that it was a more private location and that it was only the 2 of us. I felt we got a lot out of our marriage prep and it cost $330

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