(Closed) Marriage is a waste…who gets married anyway….still time to change your mind.

posted 10 years ago in Emotional
Post # 17
Member
1805 posts
Buzzing bee

Girl, I hear you.

I can’t tell you how many ‘Don’t do its’ and ‘You’re to young to get married’ (I’m 23) and ‘Are you sure’ comments I’ve gotten this week alone. My wedding is 3 days away, you think I’m going to magically change my mind after hearing an unwanted opinion from a stranger? Not fucking likely. I’m over it.

I feel your pain!

Post # 18
Member
7605 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

You can hide your statuses now from specific people and they’ll never know!  Just re-post it but change your setting first.  I’d be annoyed too – I HATE when people hijack my status with something dumb!

Post # 19
Member
2260 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2020

I think it might be a good idea to just avoid him for the meanwhile. Hes probably a good friend if hes a Groomsmen, so I would just be careful not to blow up at him, even though hes in the wrong. He might just be jealous that his marriages didn’t work out, so his cynicism is well learnt for him. I would just block your FB statuses from him right now so you don’t have to bottle up your excitement.  

Post # 20
Member
1888 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Some people are just jealous of your happiness!  I can’t imagine being so lonely that I would take the time to post negative responses to someone’s FB message about how excited they are for something good in their life. 

One of my BMs was being really moody at my bachelorette and talking about how she’s too young to be tied down and wouldn’t want to get married (she’s about a year older than me), then after my wedding, she told me she and her long-term BF broke up.  I realized that they had been having problems in their relationship and my upcoming wedding just made her sad to think about how she didn’t want to marry her BF.  Sometimes, even people we consider good friends can let their own problems get in the way of their happiness for others.

Post # 21
Member
5109 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 2011

Ugh Im sorry how frustrating!!! Some people are just to bitter ignore it.

Post # 22
Member
404 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2016

Don’t enable him!  He’s getting the reaction he wants out of you!  Don’t let him win!!  If you kill him with silence, he will stop!  My mom told me that a LONG time ago when I was a little girl, and I can tell you, it worked on the playground, and it continues to work to THIS day…just IGNORE people who are acting unkind, and THEY WILL STOP eventually.  “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me.”  ๐Ÿ™‚ Good luck dealing with this handful of a GM!  I feel sorry for him because his bullying is only a result of how unhappy and lonely he is, and how much he envies what you and your Fiance have!  So if anything, pity him! LOL.  And thank goodness you’re you, and happily looking forward.  ๐Ÿ™‚ You deserve your long-awaited happiness!

Post # 25
Member
4108 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

I’d be pissed if one of our groomsmen kept saying shit like this!! Ignore it or call him out- nobody’s forcing him to be apart of this. Just because he obviously picked the wrong partners does NOT mean your situation is the same- he should just shut the eff up, really.

ETA: I must add, after reading the other comments, please say something to him next time you have to endure one of these ignorant comments- it’s completely disrespectful to you & your fiance, regardless of thier past as friends. In fact, that alone should be reason enough for him to not say these things, period. I would have no problem telling him my point of view, why you would keep your mouth shut is beyond me.

Post # 26
Member
404 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2016

View original reply
@Crisark:  Totally understandable!!  What a jerk!  But at the same time, mean people are usually one of three things: unhappy, lonely, or insecure.  Or ALL THREE.  He is acting out because of what is lacking in his life, and if you can look at it that way, you might frind a different perspective, and be able to swallow the comments a little easier.  Not that is is right what he is doing, but if he is going to keep on like you say he has, this outlook may bring you the most peace.  ๐Ÿ™‚  Best of luck!!  And congrats on your upcoming wedding!  So close!!!

Post # 27
Member
2319 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I understand he is just having harmless fun. But what I don’t understand is that why is he a GM? I mean, he can be your friend’s buddy and all, but if he is so cynical about marriages, he shouldn’t be a Groomsmen. He is welcome to the wedding and will be treated like any other guest but why give him that special status when he is not very deservering (or accepting) of it!?

Post # 29
Member
3798 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Maybe you could kindly mention that you would like him to stop being a negative nelly so that you and your Fiance can enjoy this next month? I would fear that he will spend the whole wedding day loudly protesting marriage, etc, and it would get on your nerves!

Post # 31
Member
1356 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

ugh, I seriously can’t stand people like that, but misery loves company! I have a friend that acts like this (puts you down) about everything. I got so fed up, that I disabled allowing him to see my wall. Sounds immature, but everything I read just made me bummed, so too bad for him! ๐Ÿ˜‰

and hooray – one month!!! it’s going to fly – enjoy every minute!!

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