(Closed) Marriage is for Losers…

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
307 posts
Helper bee

@MrsElopement:  that’s a really interesting article.  i have struggled with the concept of what it means to be married – what/who my partner and i need to be in order to be ready to take the step. i often think i am ready – i sure am old enough, i’ve lived a full, multi-faceted life and relish in continuing to grow – yet i know marriage is something so much more than two individuals walking side by side in their paths.

the article beautifully defines marriage on a much deeper level – going through my relationship consciously with reflection and mindfullness – i realize there are so many things we do not realize need to change in order to truly make something work for the long haul. in being a loser, in the end you will win.

a thought provoking piece that i will definitely share with friends. thanks for posting! 🙂

Post # 5
Member
1370 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Darling Husband and I have the 3rd kind of marriage, thankfully. We work really hard at it too – we have serious talks at least once/week so we’ll be sure to stay on the same page.

I shared the article on my facebook status. It’s very well written and I think it’s something a lot of people would benefit from reading.

Post # 7
Member
4337 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

  This was really interesting – I like the writer’s take on the types of marriages and what losing really means when it comes to loving someone else.

Post # 8
Member
556 posts
Busy bee

great blog! bump!!!

Post # 9
Member
1086 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Thank you for posting this, it was very interesting and helped open my eyes. My SO and I have the third type of relationship. We hear eachother, we listen, and when necessary we sacrifice and change to make the other happy. It’s the only way to work.

But I didn’t realize I am part of the second category. Not by intention and not by emotions but by learned behavior I am guessing. I was once, long ago, in a very type two relationship. For quite some time I was with an abusive man in every aspect from physical to emotional. I’ve healed but never realized that it could have effected me but…

When SO and I do rarely fight, he always says I have to be the one who is right. I have to be the one who wins. I never looked at it that way but when it does come down to it, I will do anything I can and everything I can to prove there is a reason for me to be hurt, even if it’s a problem that didn’t exist when the argument started.

So I guess it’s good we only fight once every 6 months or so, it gives me time to work on this now that I know what I am… I’ve got to let him be right. Let him feel like the winner.

Thank you again, I think this article just might make things even better in a relationship that I didn’t think could get better (other than a ring being added to it 🙂 )

Post # 11
Member
454 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

This was great to read!  Thanks for sharing!  I have to say that SO and I were more situation 1 when we first starting dating…thank goodness for growing up, and growing into our relationship.  I’m proud to say it’s more type 3 than anything else.  Love makes us grow as human beings in ways that continually amaze me.  🙂

Post # 12
Member
5655 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2011

So glad this was shared!

Darling Husband and I definitely have a type 3 marriage and BOY am I thankful for that!

Sharing on my fb now =)

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