(Closed) Married bees- Does anyone find marriage easy?

posted 7 years ago in Married Life
Post # 91
1117 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I’ve only been legally married for three months or so but it doesn’t feel any different than how it felt before we got married when we were just living together. Our relationship has had it’s fair share of challenges, though. We were long distance for most of it, but I think that only helped cement the importance of good communication. I also battled depression for the better part of a year before getting it under control, including a loss of sex drive, and coupled with panic attacks that emerged after seeing something that triggered previously under control PTSD. And on top of that, we had to deal with his father passing; we did a lot of leaning on each other in the first few months of living together. Now we’re battling money issues (I’m out of work right now and he’s the only income) and we’ll be moving back to his home country later this year.

All in all I’d say LIFE has been challenging but the RELATIONSHIP hasn’t been the cause of any of those things and has always been more of a solace than something to “work at” for us.

Post # 92
9565 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2015

I can’t comment from my own experience but I have two friends who have been miserable in their first year of marriage and (to me) it’s obvious they picked the wrong guy for the wrong reasons. They expected him to change, or weren’t realistic about their guys financial prospects or just had naturally clashing personalities.

Other friends I think made better choices and are so happy, but even they say they have to work through emotionally hard stuff and really face themselves and grow to accommodate a happy marriage. 

I feel optimistic about my FH because we have so much fun together, we truly understand each other and we in sync about having alone time while in the same roof, as well as hobbies we enjoy together. We’ve also talked about all the major stuff. We will have to adjust to moving in together, but we are committed to figuring it ou. And have discussed some communication strategies for that.

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