(Closed) Married bees, what advice would you give to those planning their wedding?

posted 8 years ago in Recaps
Post # 47
185 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Enjoy and try to remember every second of it,I feel like I didnt get to enjoy quite everything and like I can’t remember some things which makes me sad but it all went by so fast so I think thats why I can’t quite remember everything. Dont sweat the small stuff, the small things really don’t matter, all that matters is that at the end of the day you’re martied to the person you’re in love with and that in itself is perfect. 🙂

Post # 48
643 posts
Busy bee

Cater your music to your guests. We hired a live band but the main singer fell sick. Her replacement sang songs that catered to a different demographic and as a result only about 40% of our guests danced.

Post # 49
77 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Put as much thought into your ceremony as you do into your reception. My husband and I wrote our own vows and picked a stellar Justice of the Peace, and there was not a dry eye in the house! As we were standing up there, it really hit me that this was the reason for the party, the photos, the dress. All of it was because we were celebrating and announcing how much we loved each other.

To tack onto that: It is NOT your day. It should be equally shared by you and your FH. The more you give, the more it comes back to you. If you have to continuously fight with him/her for control, ideas, songs, invites…maybe you should hold off on getting married.

Bridesmaids and groomsmen are people too. Never was this more apparent to me than when my cousin/BM lost her longtime boyfriend in a car accident 3 weeks before the wedding. Instead of pressuring her to make decisions about the wedding and her place in it, I did what I would do as her best friend. Hug her, cry with her, and listen to her. Guess what? She still walked in my wedding, stood in for photos, and danced her ass off at the reception. They’re not your slaves, your servants, or your whipping boys. They are your dearest and closest friends. Choose wisely.

Your attitude matters. If you are grouchy, have to bully people to get what you want, and make your friends and family resent you, you are going to be a lonely person during and after your wedding. If you (at least on that day!) smile at things that go wrong, allow yourself to be spontaneous, and are gracious, it will carry through, and you will be a happy camper on your wedding night.

Post # 50
2010 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@bahamutangel:  + 1000!

You’ often read exhortations that go along the line of “It’s YOUR day, hun” and sure, it is your and your FI’s wedding day. But if you can combine the best of what you’d like while keeping in mind that you are hosting and event and thus need to be hospitable, you’ll have a great day. If you read any threads about the worst weddings that people have attended, there’s a constant theme running through them – inadequate thought given to the comfort of guests combined with a grudging or downright poor attitude towards them.

Also, never stress too much over details. Most people will get an overall impression of how the room looks. They won’t be judgemental about the lack of a pompom along the aisle, for example. Oh, and if you are having a DIY wedding (which to be fair, is most of us to some extent) make sure you have a willing and eager set-up and take-down crew. As the bride, there are far, far, better ways to spend your wedding morning than hanging bunting. Likewise, there’s something deeply depressing at the end of a fabulous day when you find yourself taking it down again instead of enjoying your wedding night!


Post # 51
585 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Choose the aspect that is the most important to each of you, and be sure to allocate enough money to those aspects to make you happy with your decisions.  Don’t spend money on smaller things that you don’t really care about and them realize that you don’t have enough to pay for whatever is really important to you.

Don’t sweat the small stuff.  No one will notice anyway.

Personalize your ceremony for you and your Fiance.  It is all about you two at this point.  Try not to feel pressured to do things to please others when they make you uncomfortable.

Be sure you guys are happy with what you decide to do.  In my grandpa’s words “if the guests don’t like and can’t accept what you’re doing, they can stay home”.

Take a moment to take it all in.  The day goes by so fast that you’ll blink and it’ll be over.  I found I took the time to look around and appreciate it all during supper.

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