(Closed) Married Bees with Small Weddings- Any Regrets?

posted 6 years ago in Money
Post # 17
599 posts
Busy bee

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loveisbrewing:  Our wedding was last month and we had 40 people. I loved it! DH’s family is huge and they wanted to invite everyone, but we wanted to keep it to people that are part of our regular life, which didn’t include aunts or uncles we don’t really see or talk to. I felt bad at first but once our wedding happened, I didn’t feel like I got to spend enough time with people as it was so I definitely wouldn’t have wanted bigger. 

To each their own, some want huge, some don’t, I would never judge someone else’s choice 😊

Post # 18
1805 posts
Buzzing bee


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loveisbrewing:  I think the tough thing to realize is that no matter what the size of the wedding there is usually at least one hurt feeling or two along the way. Due to many things we had to be really careful with our plus one invites. We decided to go with convention and limit it to people who are in long term committed relationships or, on a case-by-case basis, situations where the guests really wouldn’t know anyone else or is in the wedding party. The last thing we expected was hurt feelings from one guest who wanted to bring a plus one (who Fiance knows) who is currently cheating on her husband with said guest!! They aren’t even a true couple and he is seeing many other women (yes, he’s a dog) but I guess he felt like we were judging him since we didn’t invite the cheater specifically. We never saw that coming!! Guest lists are one of the trickiest parts of wedding planning. But you will work it out because it’s your day and it is primarily about you two.

Post # 20
943 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

We had a small wedding, about 40 people. I wouldnt change it for the world.. It was perfect!

Post # 21
326 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2014 - Presque Isle

The only regret we had was not eloping. Lol. We love our families and only invited siblings (and SOs) and parents, so about 15 people total, but it was a nightmare lol. We planned it in two weeks and my Mother-In-Law did most of the footwork, which took a ton of stress off of us, as we were dealing with my Dad having end stage lung cancer. I’d do it all again because it made my dad so happy and he passed less than a month later, but the “reception” was wild. 

Post # 22
5356 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2016

We are having a tiny (12 guest) Destination Wedding in Hawaii. It’s going to be super laid back. I could not be happier with this choice. We don’t really have a budget and I feel like since we aren’t having that many people, I can do nicer things without it costing a lot. I’ve also lost both of my parents and Fiance has lost his mom and our (well his, since I don’t have any) family aren’t overbearing or controlling, so it’s really relaxed.  

Post # 23
7881 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

The smaller the wedding, the less potential wedding stress. I’m very glad we kept things simple and small.

Post # 25
1541 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2005 - A Castle

I loved my small wedding (60 people). It was my second, but my husband’s first, so I still wanted it to be nice. We went into it expecting to pay for everything ourselves, but my parents wanted to pay for half of our dinner cost, so I let them. 

How to handle family: I have a very large Italian family. Everyone and their mother was at my first wedding. I barely knew anyone. For my second wedding, we tried to keep it to immediate family only, but there are certain members on my side that I was/am very close with and couldn’t exclude; an aunt who was also my godmother, who was also ordained to marry us, and her kids, whom I grew up with. Some of my not-invited aunts and cousins made comments about it, half joking but half serious, but I didn’t care. I don’t see them unless it’s at a funeral anyway. We did what was best for us and for our budget and I have no regrets. 

Post # 26
6952 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2016

I’m having a small wedding (tops 35 people) and we’re super excited about it. Right when we got engaged there were so many people telling us that if they had to do it all over again that they would do a small wedding. But I’ve never heard anyone say that wished they had a bigger wedding. 

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