- 6 years ago
- Wedding: July 2017
To each their own, some want huge, some don’t, I would never judge someone else’s choice 😊
We had a small wedding, about 40 people. I wouldnt change it for the world.. It was perfect!
The only regret we had was not eloping. Lol. We love our families and only invited siblings (and SOs) and parents, so about 15 people total, but it was a nightmare lol. We planned it in two weeks and my Mother-In-Law did most of the footwork, which took a ton of stress off of us, as we were dealing with my Dad having end stage lung cancer. I’d do it all again because it made my dad so happy and he passed less than a month later, but the “reception” was wild.
We are having a tiny (12 guest) Destination Wedding in Hawaii. It’s going to be super laid back. I could not be happier with this choice. We don’t really have a budget and I feel like since we aren’t having that many people, I can do nicer things without it costing a lot. I’ve also lost both of my parents and Fiance has lost his mom and our (well his, since I don’t have any) family aren’t overbearing or controlling, so it’s really relaxed.
The smaller the wedding, the less potential wedding stress. I’m very glad we kept things simple and small.
Update: We are now very seriously considering having a small (40 guests) wedding consisting only of immediate family and friends. Probably getting married in a small chapel followed by plated dinner and 2 hr open bar at a brewery, and joining the dance floor at the upstairs bar afterwards. I think this is a nice middle ground between a big wedding and an elopement. It is important to us to celebrate with our loved ones. Does anyone have any advice on how to handle friends and family that wouldn’t be included in this? I figured going the immediate family only route would avoid the awkward situation of having to choose some extended family over others but I’m sure there will still be questions.
If we went this direction, we would politely decline my parents offer, or offer that they pay for a certain part of the day, e.g. cake or flowers instead of the whole thing. Tbh, we are independent adults and I do not want to depend on our parents for such a huge amount of money.
I loved my small wedding (60 people). It was my second, but my husband’s first, so I still wanted it to be nice. We went into it expecting to pay for everything ourselves, but my parents wanted to pay for half of our dinner cost, so I let them.
How to handle family: I have a very large Italian family. Everyone and their mother was at my first wedding. I barely knew anyone. For my second wedding, we tried to keep it to immediate family only, but there are certain members on my side that I was/am very close with and couldn’t exclude; an aunt who was also my godmother, who was also ordained to marry us, and her kids, whom I grew up with. Some of my not-invited aunts and cousins made comments about it, half joking but half serious, but I didn’t care. I don’t see them unless it’s at a funeral anyway. We did what was best for us and for our budget and I have no regrets.
I’m having a small wedding (tops 35 people) and we’re super excited about it. Right when we got engaged there were so many people telling us that if they had to do it all over again that they would do a small wedding. But I’ve never heard anyone say that wished they had a bigger wedding.
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