(Closed) Married, but still want a wedding.

posted 4 years ago in Ceremony
  • poll:
    Yes : (137 votes)
    55 %
    No : (110 votes)
    45 %
  • Post # 2
    386 posts
    Helper bee

    You can plan a ceremony, but don’t call it a wedding because you’re already married. 

    Post # 3
    3712 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 2014

    Well a wedding is where you say your wedding vows, which you’ve already done. Nothing wrong with throwing a big reception after the fact though. 

    Post # 4
    1305 posts
    Bumble bee

    You already had a wedding. Congrats! You can certainly throw a party to celebrate, but it’s not a wedding and you should DEFINITELY be upfront about the fact that you’re already married. Don’t recreate your vows, etc.

    Post # 5
    422 posts
    Helper bee


    I put that in all caps because you are going to have a lot of people telling you no, you can’t have another wedding because you’re already married, blah f’ing blah. If you want to have a re-do of your vows, with all of your friends and family there, do it. If you want to just have a big reception/”celebration of marriage,” do it. Do what feels right to you, because I think it’s a pretty sucky thing to have a beautiful, classic wedding ceremony taken away from you just because life dealt you a bad hand.

    I will say that it’s probably best to let everyone know that you’re technically already married and that this is a second ceremony/vow renewal/celebration/ whatever you decide to call it, because some people are sensitive about these things and will feel like they’ve been lied to if you don’t metion that the paperwork has been signed.

    But again, you do you.

    Post # 6
    2699 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: March 2015

    This is a major point of contention on the Bee. I eloped to Vegas then three years later had a large formal wedding. It was fabulous, our closest friends knew we were married some extended family did not. Basically no one cared and everyone was thrilled to celebrate with us. Do whatever you like. The truth is no one actually cares, people who love you will want to celebrate with you. 

    Post # 7
    715 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2015

    cblank181:  You certainly can 🙂 This is very commone for military. My husband and I got legally married at the courthouse first before he left for training. We were going to have a wedding ceremony when he got back, but in the end we had some family drama and wanted to save money. But we know a lot of people who have weddings later. 

    Post # 11
    9807 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2016

    As long as you are honest with everyone about the fact that you are already married (which it sounds like you have been) I don’t see a problem with planning an event to say your vows in front of family and friends and celebrate with them.

    Post # 12
    374 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2016


    O.P- go for it! Get your dress, and have your day with your man and family!  

    • This reply was modified 3 years, 8 months ago by  kreeneth.
    Post # 13
    2878 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2015

    cblank181:  vow renewal yes. Wedding no

    Post # 14
    9095 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2012


    I got married December 2012, had my wedding (Yes, wedding. Not vow renewal) June 2013 back home with all our friends & family.

    Post # 15
    2942 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    As long as you are honest, do what you want.  My only pain point is when someone has a “secret” marriage, and then wants a big fancy wedding.  I love weddings/vow renewals and will celbrate with you, but I hate shadiness and will hold that “omision” against you.

    The topic ‘Married, but still want a wedding.’ is closed to new replies.

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