(Closed) Married for a month and haven’t changed my name…

posted 7 years ago in Names
Post # 3
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

Yeah, it went through my mind. But I did take my maiden as my middle, but that was more for professional reasons. I waited about 2 months, because I also had to renew my license which is one of the reasons why I waited. Once I started, the feelings went away. I know how you feel, but I think once you start the process the excitement of seeing things in your new name will take it away!

Post # 4
Member
5786 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2011

I waited about a month to head to social security and I didn’t really have second thoughts. But now I’m starting to feel…. idk lost? I changed my name at work recently and I’m having a hard time adjusting. People keep using my new name, but I don’t feel like I’m creating a family. I just feel like people are calling me the wrong name. I’m hoping its just an adjustment thing and I know I wanted to change my name but its just harder than I thought it would be.

Anyway, I wish I could be more encouraging, just wanted to share that I kinda get what you’re feeling.

Post # 5
Member
14496 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I havent changed mine either.  But that’s partly because I just havent had time to go pick up the certificate and go to SS office and stuff.  I feel very odd about it, for the same reason, cause my name has been mine for so long, and I dont want to lose any part of ‘me’.  I will get around to it, I’ve already printed and filled out the forms.  And we want “us” to be a unit and share a name, and I definitely want my name to be the same as our future kids. It was weird though, for me, filling out the forms almost made it more real than the wedding day, cause now I’m actively changing documents where as the wedding felt just like a huge party. 

Post # 6
Member
2562 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

It has been over a year, and I haven’t started chaning mine to the hyphenated form … LOL! It is a good thing Darling Husband doesn’t care, and says if I don’t want to change it I don’t have to.

Post # 9
Member
3049 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 1991

I didn’t struggle with changing it. But afterwards it has been really hard to say Our LastName now. I keep saying my maiden name and I’m like… wait, now I’m OurLastName now. It doesn’t help that the new name is harder to pronunciate. When I say it, people always hear it without a certain letter in there… and it’s really annoying. I do feel like a different person at times, but I’m getting used to things!

Post # 10
Member
5670 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

I had the same cold feet about changing my name too. I have been married for almost a yr and have changed my name but still keep my old license in my wallet, i think it’s a little mind game I play with myself lol. One thing to think about is that whether you change your name or not people may automatically refer to you as Mrs. Shef so you will still be called by something else. The sooner you take the plunge the easier it gets 🙂

Post # 11
Member
7779 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

It’s been 9 months since we got married and I still haven’t done it. lol. I think part of it is the hassle since we got military orders right after, but I think the other part of me just doesn’t want to. I mean, I always assumed I would but… now that it’s down to it, I don’t know that I want to.

Post # 12
Member
3624 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I, like you, want to change my name. I also totally understand the cold feet. It’ll be so weird seeing my name but not my name, but really is my name everywhere. Excited and scared. I think that’s pretty normal.

One thing that I plan on doing to keep my last name a part of me, although I realize it’s not for everyone, is getting my last name tattooed on me in a beautiful skript…

Post # 13
Hostess
11239 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

@Mrs Hedgehog: I love my new name. It’s just getting round to doing it. I’ve changed it with the bank but that’s all.

Post # 14
Member
6824 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

@Mrs Hedgehog: What you are feeling is totally NORMAL! I know for me, after 37 years of being my maiden name to all of sudden Mrs. Newlast name seems really odd.

It does feel like you lose part of yourself. I know for my experience, for about 3 weeks my name was in limbo. I changed my DL before the state of MN had their government shut down so had noooo idea when was going to get that! Then it was fairly easy to change my name at the bank, however there was screw ups on that.  They sent me new cash cards then about 3 weeks later sent me a letter with a new card and said suspicious activity on that card and was closing it. WTF the only activity on it was ME! I check my account just about every day online. Only thing I can think of is that one purchase I accidently sighed my maiden name not married name but um still it was less than a week and hello I have had an account with that bank for more than 20 years in that last name!

The Social Security office was a breeze compared to everything else.

It has been over 2 months since our wedding and I am still not used to be called by the new last name and still looks weird to me in writing.

Post # 15
Member
14496 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

@Mrs Hedgehog: HAHA! My coworker tried to call me Mrs Newlastname, and I was like OMG! I dont know if I like the sound of that… that is just WEIRD, it didnt sound like me. So now they’ve been passing it aroudn to call me Mrs D.

Post # 15
Member
14496 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

aaah!!  Wedding bee keeps double posting!

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