(Closed) Married for a month and i already want divorce ! HELP

posted 4 years ago in Married Life
Post # 2
Member
403 posts
Helper bee

See an attorney and find out what your options are. I think married for  just  a month may qualify you for an anullment. This whole situation sounds like a bad deal.

Post # 3
Member
4007 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

Yeah I think you’re over reacting, sorry. I think your biggest mistake is rushing into this relationship while you were still in the honeymoon phase of dating. Either way that’s done now. I think you really lost me when you said you’re tired of “teaching” him. He’s not a child, and it sounds like you’re trying to control every aspect of his life. You call him “easy” because he smiles and chats to anyone he meets? That’s a bit harsh. What if he called you a slut every time you smiled or were polite to another guy? If you can’t have a conversation with him without threatening divorce, then yes, I’d say you’re in trouble. 

Post # 5
Member
963 posts
Busy bee

And this, ladies and gentlemen, is why you don’t get married after 9 months. 

This is not exactly normal, but not the big deal you’re making it our to be. Your honeymoon phase is just coming to an end and you’re now starting to see who he really is, and you don’t like it. And despite calling yourselves mature at 27 and 34, this post sounds like the opposite. 

Post # 6
Member
541 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2026

It is never a good idea to get engaged a month after meeting, no matter how “mature” you think you are. It takes more than a month to get to know someone and certainly more than a year to really know them. 

Of course it’s too late for you to turn back time and redo the dating/engagement period.

Your marriage does not sound doomed but you think it’s doomed, because from what I am reading, it sounds like you are overreacting. Some people are just friendly and good talkers. That doesn’t mean they are trying to put their hands down someone’s pants every time they initiate an conversation.

Also, his brother is his brother. They might have gotten into a fight but his sibling has known him far longer than you have and a familial bond is hard to break. You’re his wife but being together only for 9 months, I wouldn’t really consider you as family yet–even though technically you are after the marriage vows. 

I think you need to take deep breaths and think rationally. 

Post # 8
Member
183 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

I second the anullment. I’m sorry bee 🙁

Post # 10
Member
4007 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

View original reply
jojo1 :  So he can no longer talk to women now that he’s married. Gotcha. Good luck with that. 

Post # 12
Member
277 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2019

Yikes. There is a whole lot going on there. Hard to believe there were no blatant red flags before the wedding…..but then again, you have only been together for 9 months!

Couples therapy  for sure in this case. You telling him you want a divorce will accomplish absolutely nothing and make him lose trust in the relationship. 

I don’t agree with getting family involved. The injured party vents to a sympathetic ear but after the dust settles, the family will never look at their family members spouse the same way. 

Try to have a serious but adult chat with your husband. Communication is paramount in any relationship…no offense but it seems to be lacking here from what you posted. 

Post # 14
Member
3173 posts
Sugar bee

Wow, you two are really mature…

Post # 15
Member
10508 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

It just sounds like he’s a friendly, extroverted guy. Which you probably would have caught onto had you dated longer. Nothing you’ve described sounds inappropriate or over the line. But you sound insecure and controlling.

The family thing is more complicated but you sound like someone who overreacts and blows things out of proportion. 

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