Post # 31
Please disregard all the “shouldn’t” responses where people tell you what you should & shouldn’t need in terms of socialalization. Staying home with my babies was hard & lonely. I did not enjoy it. And that’s ok.
That being said, your baby really shouldn’t be in the carrier all day.
Post # 32
lol i think you posted this in the wrong thread 😉 i don’t have a baby
Post # 33
How did everything work out OP?
Post # 34
After months of trying to make it work romantically and/or sexually etc (since Jan/Feb when I first told him about this), I had the hard conversation with him that it might be best for us to go our seperate ways. He’s been great through the whole thing, he’s still living with me while he gets his new living situation sorted (he can’t afford to keep the place we have now as hes still finishing up school) and we still act like we’re best friends, though I know that’ll have to change when he moves out. I feel terrible and I’m second guessing myself a LOT. But I think I’m just trying to backpedal away from change and heartbreak. I never thought I was scared to be alone but I think I might actually be.
I will really miss him. He was my home, and it really hurts to let that go. But I was making him feel insecure, lonely, and not “good enough” and as much as I want to keep him around I just can’t do that to him anymore, and he’s told me he doesn’t want to be the reason I’m unhappy. The breaking point for me was when I sat down and just typed a letter to him expressing how I feel. Leaving all the complicating factors out of it and just writing until there was nothing left to say. I read back through it and I feel like its obvious what I need to do. I have to let him go. I’m thinking about seeking out a therapist because I’m growing convinced that maybe I have low self esteem and that’s how I got into this mess, and the guilt from this situation isn’t helping any. He’s done all he can to convince me that I don’t have anything to feel guilty about, but seeing how much I’ve hurt someone I do really care about kinda trumps that in all honesty. Trying not to beat myself up too much.
Post # 35
best of luck to you. I identified with your situation so much and I’m glad you reached a decision. my greatest fear us nit.finding a solution and being in a limbo of not knowing for a long time. I understand the guilt but you have to believe that’s it’s the best for him aswell in the long run.
Post # 36
What made me stop was when you said “I am not in love with this wonderful man, but I wish I was.” I’m so sorry you feel that way. That is a hard place to be. Would your life have more value in it if you left? Do you think both of you will be happier? I’m hoping you can answer those questions based on the fact that the answer would make you happy. It sounds like if you two separated then you two would still be friends. Whatever you decide I’m sure it will be the right answer, bee. Hang in there.