(Closed) Married Young!

posted 6 years ago in Married Life
Post # 3
Member
1438 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Hello!!

I got married when i was 20, actually i have only been married for 2 months now. I dont regret getting married so young, I’m going to be with him no matter what so why not get married right? lol. A lot of people thought I was pregnant because me & my husband eloped. My family wasnt very supportive of our wedding, no one wanted to help. I know if we waited about 2 more years we would have a wondering wedding. But I dont care, Its just one day. 

I personally think being married has the same feeling as being engaged. I feel more grown up. But everything is going smooth so far. 

Congrats on your marriage!

Post # 5
Member
585 posts
Busy bee

I got married at 19 and yes, I do regret it. The young age wasn’t the sole reason for my divorce, although had I been older I would have had the wisdom and life experience to know I wasn’t read for marriage, AND he wasn’t right for me. I was book smart, but immature. The human brain doesn’t fully mature until your mid twenties, and based on this, and my personal experience, I generally don’t think getting married young is a good idea. If you talk to people in their mid twenties and on they will generally tell you that they are vastly different people than who they were 5 years ago. Myself, I didn’t feel like I really got settled into my adult personality/beliefs/philosophy until about 2 years ago (I’m almost 28). 

That being said, there are exceptions. It’s an individual situation! πŸ™‚

 

 

Post # 6
Member
1459 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I’ll have been married five months this week, we were married at 21 and 25. I think to a lot of people that would seem young, but in our circles I was about average and he was a bit older than average.

We don’t regret getting married at all, or wish we’d waited longer. We actually had an extremely long courtship and engagement compared to a lot of people we know, but it was a good length for us. Things have been fairly simple for us, but I think a lot of that has to do with place in life rather than age. We both graduated from college before we were married and now I’m in grad school and my husband is working which makes things time and money wise a lot easier for us than I think they would have been if we were still in schooll. 

It took my husband a couple of months to find a job after we were married, which was an obstacle, but we were fortunate to find a place to live and an interem job so we didn’t have to worry about rent etc. And it was nice to have all that time to be together while he was looking for a job.

One thing that we try to do is to make sure that we do fun thigns together. Because we’re young we haven’t had too much time to travel, etc. and now we can do that together, which is great. I think sometimes people who marry young wish they could have lived a little more, but we’re enjoying doing our ‘living’ together πŸ™‚

 

 

Post # 7
Member
1938 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Where I am from (and the person above me) its actually pretty common for people to get married at 19. My best friend was actually pretty sad she got married at 20 because her goal was to get married at 19 like all of her sisters had. 

I am sure there are a lot of people who regret getting married at such a young age, and I am sure there are a lot of people that do not. 

I personally waited till I was 25, but I have been with my husband since I was 18 years old. Sometimes I regret not getting to date while I was in college just for the experience, but I know that my husband is the person I would have wanted to be with ultimately anyway. 

It is all so personal that if you are happy with your choice that is all that matters. πŸ™‚

Post # 8
Member
2116 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Well I can tell you that my great grandmother married my great grandpa when she was 18 (he was 24), and they were married for over 70 years until he passed away at the age of 97. She’s 99 now and still says how good he was to her πŸ™‚

Post # 9
Bee
388 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012 - El Faro Convention center, Aguadilla, Puerto Rico

We are 23/24 and have also been married 5 months. We celebrated our 5 year dating anniversary last week, so we’ve been together for a while. 

I don’t regret it (but who would after only 5 months of marriage?) because it was the right time in our lives to take this step. We knew we wanted to be together, we’ve had the opportunity to travel in the US and abroad, we both finished our college degrees prior to the wedding and have stable jobs. We had all our” ducks in the row and that was really important to us before marriage and it defenitely influenced our parents into completely supporting our union.

Our priority for our twenties is to build a family and home in contrast to other people our age whose priority is themselves and their careers. Neither desicion is wrong or right, they are just diffrent life paths and hopefully people choose the path that works best for them.

Good Luck in your marriage πŸ™‚

P.S. We are both Puerto Rican and in our culture it is very common to get married in the early twenties. I would say it is the norm across the majority of the population. 

Post # 10
Member
1036 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

i am 20 and he is 24. we have been married for 3 months and no regrets.<3

Post # 11
Member
172 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

My grandmother was one week 17 when she and my pop got married, and he was 20. They are now 70 and 73 and have been happily married all this time. 

My mom was 18 and my dad was 24. They have been married now for 25 years. 

Now I am following in their footsteps. I am 18 and my FH is 22. I think this is the first time I’ve actually posted my age on this site because I know young brides get a lot of grief and especially someone my age. My wedding is in 2 months, so I can’t exactly say from personal experience, but based on my family history, I would say that young marriage can be a success if you are completely dedicated to your mate. Don’t go in planning an escape route. This is the person you are dedicated to spend the rest of your life with. 

I have known FH for as long as I can remember, but have been officially “dating” him since I was 16. It’s actually very common where I live to get married young. In fact, I know a couple of girls that some people in this area consider “old maids,” and they are about 24. 

My personal opinion is that young marriage can actually be a benefit. We get to continue to grow and develop TOGETHER, as opposed to getting married later when we are completely set in our ways. And I know that my marriage will be a success if we live by Bible princlples. 

Post # 12
Member
2559 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I was 21 when we got married, and it’ll be two years next week!

I absolutely do not regret it – it was the right time for us, and we were (and are) just thrilled to have taken this step in our relationship. We put in a lot of work to make sure that our life goals, communication, and basic moral values (amongst other facets) were compatible, and listened to a lot of advice on ways to make your marriage last. We haven’t had any true obstacles, but some big changes have occurred (graduate school apps, moving a few states over, etc) that have only served to bring us closer and make us stronger as we firm up some plans for our future. So excited to see where life takes us πŸ™‚

Congrats on your marriage!

Post # 13
Member
1064 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@frogprincess:  agreed!! Speaking for myself, i think only in my 30s i really figured out who am I and what i want in life..so maybe that’s why i married this year, on my 40th birthday!!! BUT i have a cousin who got married at 19 and is perfectly happy!

Post # 14
Member
596 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2009 - Ceremony: The Kraine Theatre, Reception: Midtown Loft & Terrace

We got engaged at 21 and married at 23 — VERY uncommon for NYC.

That was three years ago, and I do not regret it for a second. There are amazing times and there are rough times, but I wouldn’t change my choice of partner or timing for the world.

Post # 15
Member
576 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Well my grandmother married my grandpa at 18 after knowing him 8 weeks!

My parents married at 18/26 & have been together for 24 years.

We got married last month at 21/20. In our area, 20-25 is the average age to marry.

Post # 16
Member
5109 posts
Bee Keeper

I was married at 21, engaged at 20. My husband is older than me (11 years) and we have had a lot of judgement. I am so happy that we married when we did and I really do see a life partner in him. No regrets here πŸ™‚ 

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