(Closed) Marrying my first REAL boyfriend and dealing with the naysayers.

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
8042 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2013

I think that comeback is great, actually. Gets the point across without being rude.

You sound like you have a good head on your shoulders. Just get married – that will shut them up 🙂

I was half expecting you to write about how you’re 18 and KNOW he’s the one blah blah… but no, you sound totally reasonable and grown up. Don’t listen to them. Sure, you may be missing out… but I doubt it.

Post # 4
12248 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

@MoodyFoodie:  “You know, most families are HAPPY when their kids don’t sleep around!”

Post # 5
2401 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I don’t have a comeback but I know a couple people who married their first real boyfriend/girlfriend. If you feel like it’s meant to be and are comfortable then nothing else should matter. 

“well, I can’t help it that I got it right the first time.”  

I would refrain from saying that.


Congrats on your engagement!

Post # 7
95 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Congrats on your engagement and ignore these individuals. wth. no response necessary. Ignoring them is the best revenge

Post # 8
2401 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@canarydiamond:  Haha I was totally expecting that too. When I read how long they have been together I was like, uh what’s the big deal?

Post # 9
11752 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Honestly, I think graciously accepting their unsolicited opinion is the best way to go. Snarky comebacks just make you seem defensive and give them further leverage.


Post # 10
3357 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@figgnewton:  I agree. Refrain from saying that, otherwise you’re just being bitchy and defensive.

Post # 11
4 posts
  • Wedding: December 2013

[comment moderated for sockpuppeting]

Post # 12
1631 posts
Bumble bee

@BrandNewBride:  buahah! I love this!

I don’t have any cheeky comebacks, and usually I do, but I just wanted to say that I am my husband’s first girlfriend and he said he wouldn’t want it any other way. I wouldn’t want it any other way either, he is amazing and I would be devastated if we split because people said ignorant things like that to him AND he actually took them to heart.

Congratulations on your engagement! Tell you family to stuff it.

Post # 13
404 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

If you love him and he has proven to you that he is worth spending the rest of your life with, no one elses opinion matters.


I have had a few relationships to get where I am today, but I needed them to grow up. I was very immature in my 20’s. Honestly I dont know how my two long term boyfriends back then handled me selfishness at all. I am finally a more responsible person and can now handle a grown up relationship. I needed that time in my 20s to learn who I was and what I wanted.  A lot of the people who are saying these things to you may have had experiences like me and think its better to learn who you are before you get married. (That doesnt mean YOU don’t know who you are yet, some people take longer to figure it out)


My parents got married when my Mom was 17 and has been happily married to my Dad for 35 years now. If I had gotten married at 17 I would have no doubt been devoirced by now!




Post # 14
1030 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@canarydiamond:  +1

Sorry I’m terrible with come backs! I’m the type to say exactly how I feel and if you continue to bring up the same subject you will simply get the ‘face’ and get the hint to talk about something else.

Post # 15
1202 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2016

@MoodyFoodie:  I like your comeback 🙂

And just to make you feel a bit better, one of my best friends (we’re part of a circle of high school friends who are still best buds ten years after graduation) married his girlfriend of 7 years last year, and they seem happier than ever… They are both each others’ first real relationship! Some people really do get it right the first time. They are a great match for each other and it sounds like you guys are too!

Post # 16
1301 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

Haha, I like your “got it right on the first try” response.  If you want to say something more serious, just remind people how happy you two are, that’s all that matters, and you hope everyone who cares about you will be happy you’re happy.  My parents were high school sweethearts, met when they were 14 or 15, got married at 20, and will be together for 40 years next year.  You can’t help when you find “the one!”

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