(Closed) Me and my FI have disagreed over photography :(

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
5011 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2012

@danascully:  Would he compromise on doing a post-wedding photoshoot at the Castle? It means you don’t have to be away from your guests for so long and most photographers will add one on for a fairly small fee.

Post # 5
Member
14497 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Does he have any friends, male or female, that he can talk to about this?  Im’ sure ANYONE can tell him this is perfectly normal and that what you are asking is totally not out of the ordinary.

Post # 7
Member
5011 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2012

@danascully:  We did it and it was so lovely to be able to get those shots when we weren’t worried about keeping to time or making sure we got the steps of our first dance right. Instead we were free just to get dressed up, pose in our gorgeous wedding clothes and have a laugh with it.

Post # 8
Member
741 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

For photos, there is nothing rude about leaving your guests alone for an hour or so while the two of you take pictures. You are entitled to have some alone time to do this, and in honesty it will probably be the only time during the day where it will be just the two of you. My Darling Husband and I sort of went through this, he didn’t really see the value in the photos and wanted as little to do with it as possible. I don’t like having pictures taken of myself, and I did talk to the photograhper about this. However when the day came, taking pictures which were just us was one of the best parts of the day, it was calming in a way that we could be a little silly and enjoy our time together before the whole ceremony and reception started. I say put your foot down, but tell him you’ll talk to the photographer about him not liking to take photos so they can work around him more during the day. 

Post # 10
Member
202 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

It sounds like you’re marrying my FI!  My Fiance literally had the exact same reaction to our photography.  I don’t have any super great advice.  One kind of random compromise we made is that I told him he doesn’t have to take the normal amount of pictures with his groomsmen.  If all he takes is one formal picture with them, I’ll be happy.  And he said that sounds perfect to him.

Also, we’re having a cocktail hour, and I promised him that the guests would not be bored.  I also talked to him about the types of pictures we would be taking as a couple.  I basically told him that all he has to do is spend a half hour with me.  We don’t have to take many pictures where we’re looking at the camera.  Once he realized that we could make the photography a half hour of time for just us after the wedding (if it wasn’t obvious, we’re not doing a first look), he started to come around. 

Oh yeah, I also promised I would never ask him to take another picture in his life… 

Good luck!  

Post # 11
Member
9198 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

Oh man this sounds so familiar!  Glad you guys resolved things.  My fiance is the exact same way, but he’s resigned to “whatever you want, sweetie”.  I’ve promised to try to zoom through pictures.

Just try to make it clear how important to you to have this day well-documented.  Maybe compromise on something else he feels strongly about?

Post # 12
Member
1026 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I’m glad he’s in a better mood about it.  Don’t know how you feel about a first look, but it could be a great compromise between the two of you.   You both get ready, go take your pics with the 2 of you at the Castle area, go to the ceremony, do the family pics after and head to the reception.  Less time in between doing pictures this way and you still get all the shots you want.  

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